imagine me and you (i do)
by thetwistedpumpkin
Summary: what happens when delphine falls for cosima, the lead singer of a band? (cophine au)
1. Chapter 1

**chapter i**

A smile graces Delphine's lips as she sees her boyfriend ambling towards her with a flower in one hand, and the other on his pocket. He looks extremely handsome today, she notes, taking in the coiffed hair and the light blue v-neck under his usual leather jacket. He kisses her cheek as he reaches her, and Delphine takes in his scent. Her brows furrow.

"You smell different," she says, pulling back from his kiss.

"I bought a different bottle," he responds casually but Delphine knows that it is a lie.

She lets it slide.

Jason has been Delphine's boyfriend since the beginning of the semester, which was four months ago. She was new, and barely spoke English and he was nice to her. He's still nice. But then again, Jason is nice to all of the girls in the campus. And Delphine cannot tell him to stop being nice, or cute, and terribly charming because those are the traits that made her fall for him in the first place. Delphine only wishes, however, that Jason level his niceness to a minimum, because she would often confuse it as flirting. And sometimes, Delphine was right. More than once has she caught Jason playing coy with different girls, but she stayed. She stays because she is patient. And because Jason is nice, and cute, and charming and she cannot say no.

"Don't forget about tonight," he reminds her and she nods.

"Yes, eight o'clock at Metro,"

"Wear something pretty, okay? I'll be looking at you from the stage," he winks before he kisses her cheek again and then jogs towards his band mates.

It is the seventh battle of the bands contest that Jason and his band mates are joining and he hopes to win this time. He's going to be playing a song that he wrote especially for her. And Delphine cannot wait to hear him sing it tonight. That, Delphine guesses, is also one of the reasons why she stays with him: because he writes her songs. He immortalizes her through his lyrics, and his melody. Delphine has never had that before.

She glances at her wristwatch; it is still two in the afternoon. She doesn't have any more classes so she decides to stop by a small coffee shop across her university. The bell chimes as she enters. She takes a seat by the glass window and a familiar young man approaches her to take her order.

"Scott?"

"Oh hey, Delphine,"

"I did not know that you work here,"

"Yeah, I'm new," he smiles as he takes a pen and a pad from his pocket.

"Oh right, um, une café latte, s'il vou plais," Delphine orders. She looks at Scott and recognizes the confused look on his face. She translates, "a café latte, please,"

"Oh, yeah, that," he nods as he jots down the order and then disappears behind the counter.

It's been four months, yet Delphine is still having a hard time adjusting. Sure, she speaks better English now and she's memorized the route from her apartment to her university, or to certain malls and coffee shops. But there's still something missing. She doesn't know what it is, to be exact. All she knows is that there is still a void, like she's looking for something but she doesn't know what she's searching for precisely.

"Your café latte," Scott says as he puts the cup in front of Delphine.

"Merci, Scott,"

"That I understand," he chuckles nervously, "and you're welcome."

He returns to his station behind the counter and Delphine is left to enjoy her coffee.

Moments later, the bell chimes and Delphine turns around to see who it is. She doesn't see a face however, just a girl with a mess of dreadlocked hair, leaning casually on the counter and conversing with Scott. The guy's face lightens up as he nods frantically at what the girl is saying, leading Delphine to believe that the girl is possibly his girlfriend. She sees her hand a piece of paper to him before turning back and exiting the shop. She turns to her cup again and realizes that it is empty. She calls Scott's attention and he rushes to her.

"I'd like to pay now," she says.

"Okay," he responds before heading back to the counter to retrieve Delphine's bill.

Delphine takes out her wallet and places her payment, handing out to Scott as he approaches her again and says, "Was that your girlfriend?"

"Who?"

"The girl who came in here earlier. The one with the dreadlocks,"

Scott's eyes widen as he realizes who Delphine meant, "Oh no, that was my best friend. She told me to go to Metro tonight,"

Delphine raises her brows, "Metro?"

"Yeah, she and her sisters are playing at the battle tonight,"

"Really? My boyfriend will be competing there as well,"

"Oh?"

"Yes. Perhaps," Delphine begins to say. She knows the way to Metro, but going with a friend sounds like a better plan. "—I can go to my apartment to change and meet you here? We can attend together, if you'd like?"

"Oh –yeah, sure, awesome," Scott stutters, completely taken aback by Delphine's proposal.

He and Delphine take subjects together at the university and he could consider her as a friend but they aren't really that close. Still, he knows that he's in no position to decline.

"I will meet you here at seven thirty?"

"Yeah okay,"

"Good, I will see you tonight then,"

Delphine stands up and exits the coffee shop. She looks up at the sky; it is a good day so she decides to walk to her apartment.

* * *

The bell of the little coffee shop chimes as Delphine enters. The shop is quiet and there aren't any customers. Scott is cleaning up when he sees Delphine.

"I'll just finish this," he says and Delphine nods, taking a seat as she waits for Scott. As soon as he's done with wiping the tables, he goes to the back room and returns without his apron.

"Let's go," he says. Delphine stands up and pushes her chair back. She exits the shop with Scott behind her. After Scott locks up, they hail a taxi and head for Metro.

There was a massive crowd outside the bar. Thankfully, Delphine has a pass and so does Scott. They enter the establishment and are welcomed by teenagers and familiar faces of people from their school. Delphine sees Jason on the counter with a bottle of beer in his hand.

"Hey babe," he says as Delphine approaches her.

"Hi," she responds, "this is Scott, a friend."

"Hey Scott," Jason shakes Scott's hand before giving back his attention to his girlfriend and says, "I'm gonna head backstage now, okay? Stay somewhere I can see you,"

"Yes, okay," Jason kisses her on the cheek before ambling away.

"You're dating Jason Donnell?"

"Yes, why?"

"I thought he's with –never mind,"

Delphine furrows her brows. She's about to ask Scott for an explanation but the lights dim and the announcer jogs to the stage. People begin cheering and Scott pulls Delphine's wrist and takes her to the front of the stage.

"What are you doing? We can't just cut. My pass doesn't allow -,"

But Scott merely smiles at the muscular man guarding the VIP area and he smiles back, allowing them to enter and stand at the foot of the stage.

"How did you do that?"

"People here know me because my friend's sorta famous," he explains.

Delphine is about to ask another question but she is once again cut off by the announcer.

"Yo guys! Welcome to the seventh annual battle of the bands!"

* * *

Delphine blushes as Jason makes eye contact. He's singing the song he made for her and it is beautiful. The crowd cheers as soon as they finish and Delphine claps her hand at her boyfriend's wonderful piece. Four bands played before them, but none of them were very good. She is certain that Jason's band is going to place tonight. Three more bands played until the presenter announces the last band competing in the event.

"Let's all give it up for our favorite, the winner of the battle for three consecutive years," he raises his hand and beckons the audience to say the band name with him, "Game of Clones!"

The crowd erupts into a loud cheer and Scott whistles, clapping his hands wildly.

"The friend who visited me at the shop, the one who I said is famous, she's the lead singer of the band," he says.

Neon stream lights decorate the stage as a boy and four identical looking girls walk to center stage.

"Wow, they all look the same," Delphine says.

"Yeah, they're quadruplets," he points to a punk looking girl carrying an electric guitar, "That one's Sarah, the drummer with the blonde hair is Helena, the one on the synthesizer is Alison and that gay man on the bass is Felix."

"Where is your friend?"

But Delphine's voice dies down on the background as they start playing. Smoke emanates from the stage and a voice springs from the speakers. Delphine's heart rate quickens at the voice. It sounded so melodious, so beautiful, as though it was seducing her. The voice fitted that of a mermaid's, or a siren's, as if it was luring people to her. The singer, however, is nowhere to be found until the smoke thickens and slowly disappears, revealing a dreadlocked haired girl in glasses, her hand on the microphone, effortlessly singing, and completely immersing Delphine in her voice.

"That," Scott points to the singer, "is my friend, Cosima,"

Delphine's breath is stuck on her throat and her mouth dries as she repeats the name, liking the way it rolls on her tongue, "Cosima,"


	2. Chapter 2

**chapter ii**

Cosima closes her eyes, getting lost in her own voice and the sounds that are emanating from her sisters' instruments. This is it, this is her escape, and she is immersing herself in it. Music has always been Cosima's strong suit. She remembers being able to sing way back when she was still in her toddler years, and she can play musical instruments as well. It wasn't until they were in their preadolescent years that her sisters took a liking to music too. First it was the rebellious Sarah, and then it was prim and proper Alison. It took the three of them to discover that Helena would be perfect for the drums, after an incident of bashing a kid's head on a wall because he was bullying one of the sisters.

"Instead of smashing people, you could smash drum kits, yeah? And the best part is they won't bleed," Cosima remembers Sarah telling this to their sister, who began drumming away as soon as she saw her new "toy".

Their after school garage band practices turned into gigs when their dad booked them on one of the large scale diners in the city. Often times, they were asked to perform whenever their school had programs. And then four years ago, Sarah stumbled upon a flyer that said something about a "battle of the bands" competition, and now here they are, on their fourth contest with a crowd of people shouting their names.

Cosima opens her eyes and sees Scott in front of her, just below the stage. And then her eyes see someone else and it is like the beating of her heart is louder than Helena's drumming. She sees her, curly blonde hair, beautiful eyes, and thin pink lips. She gets lost in them. Scott says something to the unknown girl and the girl looks at her, mouthing Cosima's name.

_I can see me loving nobody but you, for all my life. _

_When you're with me, baby the skies will be blue for all my life._

Suddenly, Cosima is singing those lyrics as if she is offering them to this girl. There is something about the way this girl looks at her, like she is a scientist and Cosima is an unknown specimen. There is wonder and amazement, and yearning for discovery and Cosima likes it. She likes the way the girl mouths her name and smiles, like she has just tasted chocolate for the first time.

Their number ends and they bow. Cosima and her sisters go backstage and wait for the announcement of winners. When they are called again together with the other bands, Cosima and her sisters stay on the side, giving Cosima the opportunity to steal glances from the girl. It is like she is trapped in a trance, until Alison shakes her and Felix shouts wildly in her ears because apparently, they have won for the fourth year in a row.

"We won!"

"Huh?"

"We won!" Alison repeats, squealing this time.

* * *

Felix and Sarah share high fives while Helena happily munches on the liquorish sticks she's kept in her coat pocket all night. Cosima beams at her sisters and goes onto the center stage to receive their trophy and cash prize. Their friends and fans gather around them and congratulate them. When the cheers have finally died down, Cosima and her sisters jump from the stage down to the dance floor to celebrate their victory. Sarah and Helena amble towards the bar counter and order drinks while Alison and Felix are on the dance floor. Cosima begins looking for the girl but she only sees Scott waiting for her at their usual table.

"Hey Cos, great job, congratulations," Scott says.

"Thanks man," Cosima replies as she takes a seat. "Hey, uh, I was wondering who you were with tonight,"

"Who?"

"Curly blonde hair girl,"

"Oh, you mean her?" Scott says, pointing to a tall girl on the dance floor. She looks like she's trying to comfort a guy who seems like he's completely pissed off. Then Cosima chuckles, she knows that guy. He's one of the contestants whose band placed second runner-up.

"Yup, that's the one,"

"Her name's Delphine. I take AP Biology with her,"

"Biology? She a med student?"

"Yeah, I think she's taking Immunology," Scott replies and suddenly, Cosima's breath is violently robbed from her lungs that it feels like she is drowning.

She gulps, "Immunology, huh? Hey Scott, I think I'd like to meet this friend of yours,"

"Yeah, okay," Scott says before standing up and sauntering towards Delphine.

Delphine is alone on the dance floor, but she's just standing there with a frown on her face. The guy isn't with her anymore; it looks like the douche left her there. Thankfully, Scott reached her before she could leave. Scott talks to Delphine and then points to Cosima, who smiles and waves gleefully when Delphine looks at her. When the pair reaches her, Cosima stands up and offers a seat to the girl.

"Hi," she says.

"Hello," Delphine replies and once again, Cosima's breath is stolen from her. She did not expect to hear an accent.

_Jesus Christ, this girl is even more perfect than I thought, _Cosima mumbles.

"Excuse me?"

"Oh sorry, I just didn't expect to hear a French accent," she replies and Delphine blushes profusely. "Don't worry, I like it."

"Merci," Delphine says, "and congratulations on winning your fourth trophy,"

"Thank you. Oh, I'm Cosima, by the way," Cosima says as she stretches out her hand.

Delphine reaches out hers and shakes Cosima's, "I'm Delphine Cormier. Enchantée,"

Cosima feels a horde of butterflies erupt in her stomach as her palms connect with Delphine's. This is something familiar, yet completely new to her. But it is a good feeling, a great feeling actually.

"Enchantée" she says and Delphine giggles at Cosima's complete butchery of the word.

* * *

Cosima asks Delphine to stay with them but the French belle declines saying that her boyfriend needs her. Cosima frowns at the word.

"Alright, but if you change your mind and want to hang out with us instead, you can meet us at -," Cosima says as she scribbles something down on the tissue. She hands it to Delphine and the blonde woman could not help but smile. It was an address.

"Oui, I will. Thank you again," Delphine says as she stands up and leaves.

Scott notices the way Cosima's eyes follow the girl's trail and he smirks. He already knows what's up.

"Well?"

"Well, what?"

"Jesus Cosima, you should have given her your number,"

Cosima blushes and punches him playfully on the shoulder, "shut up nerd."


	3. Chapter 3

**chapter iii**

Delphine's face radiates happiness as she exits the bar, looking for her boyfriend. She takes her phone from her pants' pocket and dials his number. It rings but he doesn't answer. Delphine tries calling again, still no answer. She sighs, but she isn't the least bit angry. She finds herself beaming and it is all because of her encounter with Cosima. They didn't talk for a long span of time, in fact it was all pleasantries and questions about each other, but she had already memorized the way that Cosima's hands would fly all over the place when she talked, and the way that Cosima flushed when she would speak in French. She remembers the details of Cosima's face: her dreadlocks, her nose ring and her cheeky smile. But she also remembers the small subtle things like the way that Cosima looks at her with such interest. Delphine smiles; she doesn't think that anybody has ever looked at her that way before. Not even Jason.

Jason, Delphine remembers. She tries calling his cellular again, but he still doesn't pick up. She walks towards the garage and sees Jason's pick-up parked on the farthest lot. She ambles towards it but halts when she sees a girl leaning on the hood, Jason approaching her with a can of beer in his hands. Delphine's smile abruptly turns into a frown as she marches towards the pair.

"Oh, hi babe," Jason says, startled when he sees Delphine. The girl who was with him narrows her eyes and shakes her head. Apparently, she wasn't oriented that the guy she is talking to already has a girlfriend. She gives Jason back the can of beer before storming off.

"Who was that?" Delphine asks, crossing her arms on her chest.

"She's just a friend,"

"Why did she look pissed off when I arrived?"

Jason scratches the back of his neck and answers casually, "I guess she likes me,"

Delphine rolls her eyes. She's heard this from him a thousand times before and she usually just rolls with it, even though she knows its bull. She won't do it again this time though. She turns around and walks away.

"Delphine, wait," Jason says as he jogs after her, grabbing her arm and effectively turning her to face him. "Where are you going?"

"The lead singer of Game of Clones invited me to an after party,"

"And you're going?"

"Do you have a problem with it?" Delphine asks, raising her brows as she removes her arm from his clutches. Jason doesn't answer. Instead, he watches as Delphine turns around again and saunters away.

Delphine looks at the tissue paper in her hand. She's sure that the address is correct but the lack of party music and people makes her think otherwise. She raises her hand and knocks on the front door. It slides open and an unknown man (?) appears.

"Hello, is Cosima here?"

"Cosima!" the man shouts, "it's your French friend."

A running Cosima appears from the apartment and greets Delphine with her cheeky smile.

"Hey," she says a little too breathily.

"Hello."

"That was Felix,"

"Oh."

Delphine glances around the apartment. It was messy, but it radiated an artistic vibe. She sees one of Cosima's sisters on the couch and Felix grabbing bottles of vodka from the cabinet. She doesn't see anyone else besides them.

"Is this the after party?" Delphine asks.

"This? Oh hell no!" Cosima replies, smiling. She takes Delphine's wrist and they jog towards a staircase leading them up to the rooftop. "_This _is the after party."

* * *

Delphine takes another sip from her cup and then raises it as she dances to the beat of the music. Cosima is dancing beside her. She smiles. Cosima seems so fluid, so confident, and so…sexy. Delphine startles herself with the admittance. She's had her fair share of girl crushes when she was still younger and she's never been ashamed in admitting that she found other girls beautiful. But there is something different with Cosima. There is something different with the way her heart pounds just a little harder as she looks at Cosima dancing. It feels inconvenient, but she likes the way it makes her feel a little more alive.

"You need to stop looking at me like that, you know," Cosima says as she turns towards Delphine and dances around her.

Delphine blushes, had she been staring for too long?

"You are a very good dancer," Delphine comments. Cosima places her hands on Delphine's hips and sways them in tune with her own. Delphine feels her body tense at the touch.

"You're not so bad yourself."

They dance like that, closer and closer each time the song switches until they find themselves too tired to continue. Delphine takes Cosima's hand and they settle on the edge of the rooftop. They sit beside each other, enjoying the view of the city.

"Thank you for inviting me, Cosima."

"Thank you for coming."

"I didn't want to miss a Game of Clones' after party," Delphine giggles and she notices the way that Cosima smiles a little more brightly when she does.

"Honestly, I thought you weren't going to come. I thought you were going out with your boyfriend," Delphine frowns and she knows that Cosima has noticed because the dreadlocked girl clears her throat and turns away. "I'm sorry. Did you have a fight?"

"Yes."

"Well it's nothing good vodka can't fix," Cosima chuckles. She stands up and returns briefly with a bottle in her hand.

Delphine wants to say no. She didn't want to drink too much with people she hardly knew. She knows that Scott is somewhere on the dance floor but aside from him, she really didn't know much about the people she was with. But there is something about Cosima that makes her feel adventurous yet secure at the same time. She smiles and replies, "Alright."

* * *

The walk downstairs was completely perilous as both girls are already very tipsy. Delphine sways as she takes the last step. And Cosima is holding her arm, laughing because of something she said minutes ago.

"I have to go home," Delphine says, still chuckling.

"No. You have to stay here because you can't walk," Cosima whines.

"I have to go mon ami. I have classes tomorrow,"

Cosima sighs. "Alright, I will walk you home."

"You are in no condition," Delphine says after a hiccup.

"I can't let you walk home alone,"

"Alright,"

"But I have to change my shirt first because I smell like shit," Cosima says as they wobbly amble towards Felix' apartment.

Delphine plops on the couch and waits for Cosima to emerge from the bathroom. She tries her best to open her eyes, although her lids feel like weights. She shakes her head, trying her best to stay awake. Delphine stands up and shakily walks towards the bathroom. She doesn't find Cosima. Instead, she hears faint snores from Felix' bed and realizes that her guide home is already fast asleep. She approaches Cosima and chuckles when she sees how utterly adorable the other girl is. She pokes her.

"Cosima, we need to walk me home,"

"Hmmmm," Cosima replies, "go to sleep Delphine."

Delphine snorts, "You look like a puppy."

Cosima smiles, although her eyes are shut. She taps the space on the bed beside her, "go to sleep."

Delphine sighs, knowing that she won't be able to go home in her inebriated state. She stares at Cosima's sleeping figure and she's not sure if she's imagining things but she feels her heart racing inside her chest. Why is she feeling like this? She shakes her head; maybe it's just the vodka in her system. It doesn't mean anything, she tells herself as she plops down beside Cosima and feel Cosima's arm wrap around her. The brunette buries her face in Delphine's shoulder and murmurs, "you're the puppy."

And that is the type of security that sends Delphine fast asleep when she closes her eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: **shout out to EmotionalPanda who gave me the idea for this chapter. i promised it would be on the third installment, but i guess i'll put it here. thank you for the lovely reviews! i apologize for the long wait but here it is. i hope you enjoy this one

* * *

**chapter iv**

Scott jolts as he realizes that a pigeon has pooped on his shoulder. He's lying face down on the floor of the apartment roof, his breath reeking of what smelled like a mixture of vomit and lemonade. He stands up, but then stays still as the world spins around him. He has had his fair share of hangovers before but they always seem like the first one he's ever had. He looks around, plastic cups are everywhere, and there are shards of glass and broken bottles on a corner. He wipes off the dirt from his shirt, _well at least I had fun, _he thinks.

Scott wobbly ambles down to Felix' apartment. He slides the door to the side and is surprised to see an empty place. He was half expecting Felix and Sarah on the floor, with Helena on the corner and Alison obsessively cleaning around. He did not expect, however, to walk in the room and see no Felix, or Sarah or Helena or Alison but a sleeping dreadlocked girl and a curly blonde sprawled on Felix' bed. He tiptoes towards them, and covers his eyes just in case he is to see a naked pair. Instead, he sees Cosima lying back down with Delphine snuggling her. The blonde's hand is settled on Cosima's waist and her face is buried on the crook of Delphine's neck. From where Scott stands, he hears Cosima's faint snore and Delphine's slight hum when Cosima shuffles closer to her. He smiles as an evil plan comes to mind. Dizzily, he takes his cellular from his pocket and clicks on the camera application. He takes a few pictures before he puts his phone back on his pocket and leaves a note on the bedside table.

* * *

Delphine wakes up to the smell of coffee. She feels the other side of the bed: empty. Her eyes slowly open and she realizes that the brunette beside her is no longer present. She sits up.

"Hey,"

"Oh, hi," Delphine answers.

Cosima hands her a mug of freshly brewed coffee and Delphine smiles as she takes it.

"Merci,"

"No problem,"

"What time is it?" Delphine asks before she takes a sip.

"It's -," Cosima checks her wrist watch, "two in the afternoon."

Delphine almost spits her coffee as she stumbles out of bed. She haphazardly places the mug on the bedside table and struggles to put on her sandals. She doesn't remember taking them off the night before but…

"Are you leaving already?"

"I'm so sorry mon ami, but I have a class in an hour," Delphine says as she rushes to the door, Cosima behind her back.

Delphine turns around and kisses Cosima's cheeks. "Thank you so much for last night Cosima, but I must be going,"

"Okay, oh wait!"

Cosima runs and grabs a pen from a drawer and rushes back to Delphine. She grabs Delphine's hand and writes something on the back of her palm.

"Call me… for whatever reason," Cosima says and Delphine giggles.

"I will,"

* * *

Cosima dries the last plate before she starts vacuuming the rugs. She's spent the day tidying the roof and the apartment, since Felix and Sarah were nowhere to be found and Alison called earlier to say that she is on a date with her boyfriend, Donnie. Helena came by earlier to eat and then left as soon as she finished.

It's almost six in the evening and it is the only time that Cosima notices the mug of coffee that Delphine left earlier on the bedside table. She takes it and a faint smile spreads on her face as she realizes that the blonde's lips have touched this very mug. She shakes her head, _god she felt like a creepy stalker. _As she takes the mug, she notices a piece of paper with a note from Scott. It read: "Looks like someone had a good night."

Cosima furrows her brows as she takes her cellular from under the pillow. The other line rings twice before Scott picks up.

"Yo man," Cosima greets.

"Hey Cos, what's up?"

"Nothing, I just finished cleaning. I saw your note on the table,"

"Ah yes."

"I don't get it."

"I see you're too drunk to even remember," Scott chuckles. "Just wait for a sec, you'll know."

Scott hangs up and Cosima is left to wait. She knows he means her and Delphine. But she doesn't truly comprehend what he means until her phone vibrates and she sees pictures sent from Scott's phone. She opens them and sees photos of her and Delphine, snuggled together as they slept. Cosima feels her cheeks burn and she isn't sure how she should react. On the picture she was lying casually, and Delphine was beside her, holding on to her tightly like a life line. She blushes. How come she didn't feel her?

Cosima scratches the back of her neck. This is new, she tells herself. She's always been a chick-magnet, and bringing girls to after parties every time they had gigs is something entirely usual for her. But sleeping beside them fully clothed, cuddling and wanting to know more about them isn't her typical thing. She had never felt this way before. This, whatever she is feeling, is a complete novelty and she is amazed by the freshness that it brings her…that Delphine brings her.

She clutches her chest as she looks at the picture again. There aren't any butterflies in her stomach; there's a whole flipping zoo rioting in it. The corners of her eyes wrinkle as she smiles brightly. Then she has a thought and she shakes her head. _No, this can't be love. It's too soon, _Cosima tells herself. But her denial does not stop her from saving the pictures that Scott sent her.

She places her phone on the bed and finishes her cleaning.

* * *

As soon as the apartment is clean, Cosima settles on the couch. She deserves a break after all. She soon finds herself falling fast asleep. In her dreams she sees Delphine's face. They are in the beach and they are running around like children. She can picture the blonde's face perfectly, like she has had the pleasure of staring at it all her existence.

"Come on mon ami," Delphine says, her French accent sticking in Cosima's ear.

Delphine runs off and Cosima chases after her. She purposely slows down so that Cosima can catch her. The brunette wraps her arms around Delphine and they tumble ungraciously on the sand, giggling even as Cosima's glasses are now covered with specks of sand. Cosima's breath hitches as she realizes their position. Delphine is lying with her back on the sand and she is straddling her. Delphine's face turns serious, as if it was filled with curiosity. She reaches her hand and touches Cosima's cheeks. She sits up and in a short moment, their faces are mere inches from each other. Delphine smiles and Cosima feels her head implode. _This is it._

Delphine removes Cosima's glasses and places it on the ground. She moves forward and Cosima leans in. She closes her eyes as she feels Delphine's nose brush hers. And in a swift movement, Delphine surges forward and they ki—

"Sestra! Sestra, wake up! Your device is moving wildly on the bed!" Helena says, shaking Cosima to awaken her.

"Helena! I was having a really good dream!"

"I know this because you are making kissy face but your cellphone is buzzing!"

"Ugh, fine," Cosima stands as Helena runs to Felix's bed where her sister's phone was.

Cosima walks sluggishly towards her phone and picks it up. It isn't vibrating anymore. She slides the screen to unlock. It says: 2 missed calls from an unknown number.

In her hands, it buzzes again and she answers.

"Hello?" she says, her voice still oozing with sleepiness.

"Hallo? Cosima?"

Cosima's heart skips a beat.

"This is Delphine. I'm sorry, did I wake you up?"

"Of course not,"

Delphine giggles; she knows this is a lie as she hears Cosima yawn.

"Then what were you doing before I called you?"

"I was thinking about you," Cosima answers.

Delphine chuckles, "Stop thinking about me -,"

Cosima frowns and her heart beats faster as she realizes that Delphine might have misinterpreted her. Well, yes, she was flirting. But why was she? She knows that Delphine isn't…well…gay. But then Delphine continues talking,

"—and go to the café where Scott works."

"Why?"

"Because I am heading there and I would like to see you."

Cosima chuckles, "Alright. I'll be there," she says and then she hangs up after Delphine says good bye.

She rushes to her luggage bag and takes a shirt to change into. She jogs to the bathroom and takes the quickest bath in world history and then changes into clean clothes.

She heads for the door but stops when she realizes Helena smirking at her.

"What?"

"Frenchie is the one you make kissy face in your dreams?"

Cosima blushes.

"It is okay Sestra. Frenchie looks like angel."

"She does."

"Okay, go get your baguette," Helena smirks.

Cosima chuckles as she heads out. _She will. _


	5. Chapter 5

**chapter v**

Delphine shuffles her foot. _Just three more minutes, _she tells herself as she checks her wrist watch for the nth time that afternoon. She huffs and mentally berates herself for leaving Felix' apartment. If only she had known that her professor would discuss something that she'd already read in advance, she wouldn't have attended class. She would have just stayed with Cosima.

Cosima.

Her heart flutters at the thought. Why does her heart do that? Why does her heart feel like it jumped off a cliff and landed on a bed of flowers whenever the brunette comes to mind? She's never felt like that with Jason before. Not even once. He's never made her want to skip classes before. She sighs. This is a whole new feeling for her. _God_, she thinks. _Cosima is a girl. And I am a girl. What the hell is happening?_

She knows exactly what is happening but she doesn't acknowledge it. After all, she's only known the girl overnight. And besides, she isn't gay. Maybe she just had too much to drink. Yeah. That's it.

The bell rings and Delphine finds herself bolting out of the classroom and hailing a cab to get to her apartment. She has another class in an hour but she needs to go home and take a shower –besides brushing her hair, which was the other thing she'd neglected to do after spending the night with Cosima. Thankfully, she didn't smell much of alcohol when she was in class.

She pays the driver and gets off in front of her apartment gate. She takes the stairs and notices a boy standing just by her door.

"Jason?"

Jason turns around, looking sheepishly, "Hey".

"What are you doing here?"

"I just…I didn't hear from you last night and I just want to know that we're okay,"

Delphine walks closer to him and takes her keys from her pocket. She slides it in the hole and unlocks her door.

"We're okay, right?" Jason asks, "Delphine, that girl last night -,"

"Doesn't matter," Delphine cuts him off.

Delphine opens the door and immediately steps inside. Jason follows her.

"Then why do you sound so mad?"

"I am not mad, okay?"

"You seem like you are,"

Delphine doesn't have time for this. She doesn't –not because she's mad and is just playing hard to get but because she isn't mad at all. She just doesn't know what to say. Honestly, in that one night that she's spent away from him, he's never really crossed her mind. And that was something new. It wasn't because they weren't okay. There were times before when she was angry and she'd still come looking for him. But last night was completely novel. That was the first time she didn't look for him and it was because she had a good time with someone who made her completely forget that she has a boyfriend.

She sighs. God.

Cosima makes her forget that she has a boyfriend. _Why is that? She just met her yesterday._

"We're okay, Jason, okay? I just… I'm still a little… hungover," she lies. She's gotten off that train when she woke up beside the brunette. But she doesn't have time to work through whatever she is feeling right now. She just wants to get to class and end the day.

"Okay," Jason says in defeat. She huffs as she leads Jason out the door and makes her way to the shower.

* * *

Delphine stands up and heads for the door. Her class has just ended and it's still pretty early to go home. She checks her wristwatch, it is almost seven. _What to do? _She thinks about going to the library and reading lessons in advance. Or perhaps she could go to a restaurant and treat herself a good dinner. But in the end, her thoughts lead to Cosima.

Cosima, the name reverberates in her brain. She doesn't know why but Cosima makes her feel so differently, from the moment she saw her on stage until they had said their goodbyes. It is a good different, like she has known Cosima all her life. Cosima makes her feel alive, but also secure. She makes her feel so many things. And she knows it isn't right because she's only met Cosima yesterday, yet Delphine wants more of her.

She rummages through her handbag and sees a crumpled tissue paper where she jotted down Cosima's number on it. She hesitates at first but all her uncertainty crumbles down as she takes her phone from her pocket. She dials the number on her cellular but Cosima doesn't pick up. She tries the second time, and still no answer. Perhaps Cosima is busy and is away from her phone, Delphine thinks. One last try, she tells herself. The other line rings once. Twice. Thrice. And then a groggy voice echoes from the other line.

"Hello?"

Delphine resists the urge to giggle.

"Hallo? Cosima? This is Delphine. I'm sorry, did I wake you up?"

"Of course not,"

This time, Delphine chuckles. She knows that it is a lie as she hears Cosima's yawn from the other line.

"Then what were you doing before I called you?"

"I was thinking about you," Cosima answers. Delphine's heart pounds in her chest. Did Cosima just say she was thinking about her? Why? No. This isn't right. Cosima shouldn't be thinking about her. And Delphine shouldn't be happy that Cosima had said that. Delphine panics. What is she doing? Why did she even call Cosima?

"Stop thinking about me—"

She doesn't hear Cosima on the other line and she fears that she has been misinterpreted. She adds, "—and go to the café where Scott works."

"Why?"

Delphine doesn't know why she's said that. She merely wanted to hear from the brunette. It was a Freudian slip, she tells herself. Or perhaps she really does have that desire to see Cosima again. She doesn't admit it but she doesn't push the thought away.

"Because I am heading there and I would like to see you."

"Alright. I'll be there,"

They say their goodbyes and Delphine hangs up.

She checks her wristwatch. It's seven. She walks towards the café.

* * *

The bell jangles as Delphine enters the café. She takes a seat by the window and sees Scott approaching her.

"Hello Delphine,"

"Hello Scott,"

Scott hands her a menu and readies his pen.

"Oh, would it be okay if I order later? I am waiting for someone," Delphine says.

"Ah, alright then. I'll just leave the menu with you," Scott smiles and ambles away.

Delphine isn't excited. This isn't a date. She just invited Cosima for…for… Why exactly did she tell Cosima to come? She doesn't even know.

The bell chimes as the café door opens and Delphine finds herself anxiously looking at whoever has entered. It wasn't Cosima. It was Jason.

Jason sees her immediately and saunters towards her. He slides in and sits on the chair across her.

"Hey, babe."

"What are you doing here?"

Jason seems offended by this. "Am I not allowed to have dinner with my girlfriend?"

"I'm sorry. Do we have plans for tonight?"

"I didn't know I had to schedule my dates with you," Jason scoffs.

"Well I am meeting someone tonight."

"Who?"

The bell jangles again and in comes Cosima Niehaus. She is wearing an oversized red sweater and a pair of black legging. She looks beautiful, Delphine thinks as her breath suddenly hitches. Cosima ambles towards Delphine, waving as she approaches. She frowns a bit however, when she notices that Delphine has company.

"Hey Dephine and...dude," Cosima says as she reaches the pair.

"Hey _dude_," Jason repeats, emphasizing his words. He stares pointedly at Delphine. "Is this who you're meeting?"

"Yes," Delphine answers meekly, like she's done something wrong, like she's guilty of something.

"Oh cool, I thought I was crashing your date or something," Cosima says.

Jason stares at Cosima and then looks to Delphine.

"Apparently, I'm the one who's not invited."

Cosima chuckles, "Guess you're the third wheel."

Jason huffs and stands up, "Call me when you get home, babe," he says as he kisses Delphine's cheek, drawling out the words.

Delphine is silent. She doesn't know why she's feeling so ashamed. It's as if Jason has caught her doing something she's not supposed to be doing.

Jason walks away and Cosima takes his seat. Delphine looks at the girl in front of her and for a second there, she knows exactly why she's feeling guilty.


	6. Chapter 6

**chapter vi**

This is going to be awkward, Cosima tells herself as she enters the café and sees Delphine seated by the window…with her boyfriend.

All her excitement suddenly wanes as thoughts jumble in her brain. Firstly, why exactly did Delphine invite her over? Secondly, what exactly is the purpose of her invitation? Thirdly, why is her boyfriend here? Fourthly, why did she even come? She thinks about turning back and getting out of the establishment before she makes a fool of herself in front of Delphine and her boyfriend. Yet, somehow, the look on Delphine's face is beckoning, like she's asking her to come to them. Cosima's had her fair shares of bad relationships, and she isn't saying that Delphine and her boyfriend are in a mess, but she doesn't see the happiness in Delphine's face either. It looks like the blonde is…guilty?

Cosima takes in a deep breath and saunters towards the pair's table.

"Hey Delphine and…dude," she says and she mentally smacks herself in the forehead. _Smooth, Cosima. _

"Hey dude," the boyfriend replies. There's a tone in his voice that suggests hostility but Cosima shakes it off. Maybe he's just pissed at her because Game of Clones won…again. Yes, she recalls. Delphine's boyfriend was a contestant of the battle of the bands. He was the one who walked away last night. She looks at him, he seems like he's still pissed.

"Is this who you're meeting?" he asks.

"Yes," Delphine answers meekly. Cosima isn't sure what's going on but something is definitely wrong with Delphine. This isn't the confident blonde that she met yesterday. This is a girl who's afraid of something. She doesn't know what it is but she hopes that this…boyfriend hasn't hurt her in any way. She becomes surprised at her own thoughts. She's only known Delphine overnight but she feels protective of her.

"Oh cool, I thought I was crashing your date or something," Cosima says coolly.

The guy simply stares at her and then looks at Delphine.

"Apparently I'm the one who's not invited."

Cosima knows the tone in his voice. He's not just pissed of at her. He's also pissed at Delphine. She doesn't know why but she can tell that Delphine is feeling edgy. So she does what she does best and jokes to lessen the tension.

She chuckles, "Guess you're the third wheel."

The guy huffs and finally stands up, staring right at Cosima when he lowers his upper body and leans to kiss Delphine's cheek. He seems like he's showing off.

"Call me when you get home babe," he drawls out and Cosima fights the urge to roll her eyes.

As soon as the guy leaves, Cosima takes his seat. Delphine doesn't say anything. She's merely staring at her. Cosima breaks off the silence.

She clears her throat and says, "So…that was your boyfriend, huh?"

"Uh, yes, my boyfriend,"

Cosima chuckles, "Does he have a name?"

Delphine cracks into a smile, "Oh god, I'm so terribly sorry. I didn't even introduce you to him. His name is Jason by the way,"

"Jason, huh? Well, he seemed…friendly?"

Delphine giggles as she swats Cosima's hand on the table. "He is, very much. I can tell he liked you a lot,"

Cosima sniggers and shakes her head, "He really did, didn't he?"

* * *

Cosima manages to take her eyes away from Delphine and beckons Scott to come to them.

"Can I order?"

"Yeah, go ahead."

"I'd like a Mocha Frappucino and…," she turns to Delphine.

"A café latte," Delphine says.

Cosima takes in a breath, "And that," she says. Scott ambles away to retrieve their order.

"What?" Delphine asks.

"What do you mean 'what'?"

"Your face had a different expression when I said my order,"

Cosima shakes her head. "It's your accent. It's just so damn…sexy," Cosima doesn't know why she's said it. _What the fuck, now Delphine is going to think she's a goddamn weirdo._

Delphine blushes, and bites her bottom lip. _God please don't do that._

"You don't think I sound like an alien?" Delphine asks.

"Of course I do, but you're the cutest alien there ever is,"

Behind the counter, Scott is eyeing the pair. They've been laughing and talking for almost an hour now. God, he wishes he could hear what they were talking about. From where he is standing, he can see Delphine's face turning a light shade of pink. _Smooth, Cosima, _he mentally says. He's been Cosima's friend since they started college and he knows full well that when Cosima likes a girl, she goes and gets her. Cosima definitely likes Delphine, Scott can tell. But something is different with the way that his friend is smiling. He's never seen her smile that widely before, just now. There is something different in how Cosima tenses and then relaxes when Delphine touches her hand. And there was something else in her eyes, like they've never shone that bright before. This isn't just a crush, Scott knows. It is growing into something more.

* * *

It is almost 10 in the evening. Cosima and Delphine are walking on the sidewalk towards Delphine's apartment. Cosima doesn't remember what they were previously talking about but she recalls offering to walk Delphine home. _It feels like the chivalrous thing to do, _she reasons with herself. Now, Delphine is bombarding her with questions as if she is on a hot seat.

"So you have three siblings who look exactly like you,"

"They don't look exactly like me. I'm prettier than the rest of them," Cosima replies smugly.

"Oui, you are,"

Cosima blushes, tucking in her bottom lip behind her front teeth.

"And you are studying in the same university as I am, yes?"

"Yup,"

"And you are majoring in?"

"Oh you know, sciencey stuff, mostly evo-devo,"

"Evo-devo?" Delphine asks, confused.

"Evolutionary Development,"

"Oh, I see. And you met Scott…when?"

"He's been my friend since freshman year."

Delphine looks at Cosima like she is studying her, like she is taking in every detail of her. Cosima isn't sure on how she should react. Nobody's ever looked at her like that before.

Delphine must have noticed the way that Cosima is looking back at her because she says, "I'm sorry, am I asking too many questions?"

Cosima chuckles, "It's fine. It's just that I haven't been interviewed like this since our first win on the battle. I like the attention."

Delphine nudges her lightly, "I just…I want to know you better,"

Cosima beams. She does not try to hide the blush that is slowly spreading from her face down to her neck. She likes this. She's never had this. All she had before were one night stands and a relationship that ended too soon because her girlfriend realized that she isn't really into girls. She's never experienced this. She's never had someone look at her in the eyes and tell her that they wanted to get to know her more, especially someone whom she just met the night before.

"Then I'll tell you whatever you want to know," Cosima replies.

Delphine smiles and then says, "You can tell me some other time."

"Why can't I tell you now?"

"Because we are already here,"

Cosima stops walking as she realizes that Delphine is talking about the apartment on their left. She eyes the blonde as pushes the gate open and beckons Cosima to the porch.

"Do you want to come inside?" she asks.

Cosima wants to say yes, she really really does. She looks at Delphine and replays the events that happened overnight. _It's been one night, _she tells herself, _but thunder hit me if I don't admit that I am so into this girl. _

Cosima isn't the type of person who would not admit her feelings to herself. She's known for being congruent with her feelings. And this is one that she would be damn honest with herself with. She likes Delphine. But she also isn't the type of person who would steal somebody else's girl. She can't bring herself to do that, no matter how much she really wants to. _That's like stealing someone else's discovery and then getting credit for it. _

"I can't," she lies.

"Why not?" Cosima tries to hide the rush that she feels when she hears the disappointment in Delphine's voice.

"I have…early band practice tomorrow before I go to school."

"I see,"

"Yeah, too bad."

"Will I see you again?" Delphine asks.

"If you want to," Cosima replies.

"Of course,"

Cosima smiles, "then you know my number."

"And I know where you live,"

Cosima raises a brow, "How? Have you been stalking me?" she jokes.

"You live at the address you gave me, non?"

"No," Cosima chuckles, "that was Felix's apartment. My sisters and I actually still live with our parents, since they live nearby."

"Oh,"

"You'll meet them someday,"

"Who?"

"My parents," Cosima says. _Oh god, I sound like a weirdo. Why the heck will I introduce her to my parents? _

Delphine beams, "I will wait for that day."

Cosima chuckles, _smooth, Cosima._


	7. Chapter 7

**chapter vii**

Delphine isn't sure why she's sad to see Cosima go. She doesn't even know why she invited the girl to come inside her apartment. All she knows is that she's happy that she spent the night with the brunette. Everything just seems so easy when she's with Cosima. She can be herself, and she can say anything she wants to say. The best thing is that she can completely ramble about science and she wouldn't get the confused looks that Jason would usually don. _Finally, someone who understands. _

Delphine smiles at the thought of Cosima but mostly, at what Cosima said before she left. Did she really mean it when she told Delphine that she'd introduce her to her parents? Delphine blushes and then she mentally rebukes herself for doing so. Why in the world is she happy about that? It's not like she doesn't know her other friends' parents. That's right, Delphine tells herself. Cosima is a friend. She's _just _a friend. So why does she need to force herself into believing it?

She sighs. No, she isn't going to stress about this. Instead, she decides to take a nice warm bath before she retires to bed. She turns the tap on the tub and prepares a glass of wine for herself. She places the glass on the side of the tub along with her cellular before she discards her clothes and dips in the water.

She closes her eyes. But the chiming sound of her cellular makes her open them again. She dries her hand with a towel before taking her device. She reads:

_One new message from Jason_

_Hey babe, are you home?_

Delphine exhales. She's forgotten all about her boyfriend again. She quickly types a response and presses send.

_-Hi. I just arrived home. _

_I see. Can I come over?_

_-I don't think so. I am very tired. I need to rest early. I am sorry._

_It's fine. See you tomorrow?_

_-Oui. Good night Jason._

_Good night. I love you_

_-I love you too._

But she feels like she doesn't really mean it anymore when she says it back. It feels like she's just doing it out of habit. Has she been doing that for a long time now? She doesn't really know.

* * *

Delphine wears a tank top and a blue cotton pajama before she slips into bed. She doesn't feel tired at all. Part of her just wants to talk to Cosima again, but that would probably be too much for a day. Yet, Delphine couldn't help herself. She grabs her cellular from the bedside table and thinks of a non-creepy way to start a conversation. _Hey, _she starts to type. But she doesn't like it. _Are you asleep? _She tries, but that is just stupid. She doesn't know what to say because she doesn't want Cosima to think that she is all over her, although she is beginning to feel like she is. She places her cellular on her stomach. _Gods, I'm an infatuated weirdo, _Delphine reprimands herself.

Suddenly, her cellular chimes and she sighs, thinking that it is Jason again. It isn't. She beams. It is Cosima.

_Hey frenchie_

Delphine rolls her eyes at the name-call. She responds with lighting speed.

_-Hello to you too, crazy American girl_

_You are just really racist, aren't you? Kidding. What's up?_

_-The sky._

_Oh and a comedian too. Ha ha! No, I mean what are you doing right now?_

_-Nothing. I am lying in bed._

_Oh. Are you going to sleep?_

_-Non. I am not sleepy yet._

_Good. I was thinking we could play a game._

Delphine raises a brow. What game?

_-What kind of game, mon ami?_

_Stop speaking in French. It's distracting._

Delphine giggles.

_I was thinking, since you still have questions to ask me, we can play 20 questions. I can't really be sure when I'd see you again, so…_

_-That would be great. But how do we play it?_

_I ask a question, you answer. And then you ask a question, I answer._

_-Alright then. Shall you ask first?_

_No, you go first. _

Delphine hovers her thumbs on her cell's screen. She tries to think of questions she can ask. But then again, she wants to keep things simple. So she types:

_-What is your favorite color?_

_Black. Or red. Both? Both is good. Alright, my turn. What's your favorite movie?_

-_I would like to respond with a documentary. Or perhaps scientific movies like "The Core", but really it's Titanic. _

Delphine giggles at her own admittance. She's seen Titanic a billion times but she never gets tired of it. It never ceases to make her cry.

_Seriously? Wow, okay. I'll take it. It's your turn, you know._

_-Oh right, yes. What is your favorite food?_

_Easy. Eskimo Pie._

_-What is an Eskimo Pie?_

_You know it's my turn right? Ha ha. What, you've never had one before?_

_-Non, I'm afraid not._

_I'll buy you one when we see each other. I swear it will be the best thing you've ever tasted. Okay, for my question…do you have any siblings?_

_-Non. I am an only child. Hmm… Coffee or tea?_

_Coffee. _

Delphine smiles at Cosima's answer, and then thinks of a response. Time passes by quickly that Delphine does not realize that it is already past midnight. She isn't even the least bit sleepy and she knows that it has everything to do with Cosima. The brunette simply makes her feel alive.

* * *

The pair had already exchanged nineteen questions with each other, each showing sides of both of their personalities. So far, Delphine discovered that Cosima had an older sister named Beth, who died in a train crash. She also discovered that the brunette's sister, Helena, had been sent to a Russian convent when they were still young. On her part, she shared a part of her life when she was still in France. Cosima relentlessly asked her about science institutes and museums located in her home-country and she was glad to answer all of the brunette's inquisitions.

The words come easily to her. She doesn't have to think long and hard about what she wants to ask. And there are moments when she'd already know Cosima's answer before she even sends her question. It's like she's known Cosima all this time, although she really hasn't. She's only known the girl for a day but she feels like she's an extension of her, like she knows the brunette's likes and dislikes because those are her likes and dislikes as well.

It all comes down when Cosima asks her final question that Delphine takes more than five minutes to think of an appropriate response. She stares at her cellular and blinks. Once. Twice. Thrice. The question doesn't change.

_So for my grand finale…What do you think about bisexuality?_

Delphine chews on her lower lip. How did their questions get this deep? She hovers her thumbs on the screen of her phone and types.

_-I haven't really thought about bisexuality, for myself I mean. But I know that sexuality is a spectrum. And social biases codify attraction. It's contrary to biological facts, you know?_

She presses send and hopes that Cosima doesn't bring it up again. It's true. She's never thought about bisexuality for herself. She's never even brought that word up until now.

_That's oddly romantic. Your turn frenchie. It's your last question by the way, so make it count._

Delphine purses her lips. She's been thinking about asking Cosima this question ever since they started the game, but she isn't sure if she wants to know the answer. She tries to think of an alternative but the query is stuck in her head and her brain is somehow urging her fingers to type it in. She refuses, for a minute. But then she thinks, why would Cosima's answer affect her in any way? They are simply friends, playing a game of getting to know each other. She types with lightning speed but then she finds herself holding her breath when she presses send. She stares at her question and patiently waits for the other girl's reply.

-_Alright. Final question: do you have a boyfriend?_


	8. Chapter 8

**chapter viii**

Cosima blinks.

_-Alright. Final question: do you have a boyfriend?_

That's Delphine's question? Shit. Cosima scratches the back of her neck. How the hell is she going to answer that? She sighs. She knows that she has to tell Delphine about her sexuality, but she doesn't know how. She's only known the girl for a day and she isn't about to blow everything off because for all she knows, Delphine could secretly be homophobic. Cosima is not afraid of the criticism though, that much is true. She had been out of the closet since she was in middle school and her family had never judged her in the way that she thought she would be. And her friends, especially Scott, had never treated her differently because of her preference. _Those who matter won't mind and those who mind won't matter_.

No, she's not afraid of the criticism. She's afraid because it's going to come from Delphine and for the first time in forever, Cosima isn't sure of what to say. In the one day that she's spent with the girl, she knows that she matters. She knows that it's not going to be the judgment that's going to bother her; it's going to be the fact that it will come from Delphine.

So she does what she does best and thinks. How can she tell Delphine that she's gay without actually telling her that she's gay? She ponders and then types a response and presses send.

_There are no boyfriends around me right now. And nor will there ever be._

Now it is Cosima's time to wait.

Her cell vibrates.

_-What do you mean?_

Cosima groans. Must she explain every bit of what she means?

_You know that the game has ended, right? _

Cosima sends, trying her luck by replying wittily.

_-I know. But I do not understand what you meant with your last answer._

_It means whatever it wants to mean._

_-I am being serious. What do you mean by "nor will there ever be"?_

Cosima groans. Fuck this.

_It means that I'm gay, Delphine._

_-Ah. Alright._

Cosima doesn't know if that "alright" is a sign of acceptance or a means of saying "please don't talk to me again". She feels her throat constrict but she doesn't jump into conclusions. Instead, she asks.

_Does that bother you?_

She waits until she falls asleep.

She wakes up. No response.

* * *

"Oi, what's up with you today?"

"Are you not feeling well?"

Cosima pokes her spaghetti. It's seven in the evening and still no response from Delphine.

"Oi," Sarah says, throwing a crumb of garlic bread at her sister.

"I'm fine," Cosima mumbles.

"Are you sure dear? You know that strong emotions aren't good for you,"

"Yes mom, I am," she replies haughtily before excusing herself.

She rushes back to her bedroom and locks the door. Plopping down on her bed, she stares at her cellular and mentally berates herself for having told Delphine the truth. She's not ashamed of her sexuality, she really isn't. It just bothers her to her very core that the girl she is crushing on is unattainably straight and quite possibly homophobic since she hasn't received anything since her confession the night before. She groans.

* * *

Delphine must think that Cosima only wanted to meet her because she finds her pretty –in an inappropriate way. And to be fair, that _was _Cosima's reason for having called Delphine from the dance floor and onto their table that night at the battle. But that isn't the reason why Cosima invited Delphine over at the party. She invited her because Delphine isn't the typical pretty girl that you see across the hall. She isn't the mean cheerleader in your high school with the pretty blonde curls and the French accent. She's Delphine, a science sponge (like her) with a good taste in music; a girl who's smart because she prefers being in the library and in quaint little coffee shops; but someone who also knows her vodka. Those are the reasons why Cosima wanted to get to know her better. But that thing that struck her most about the blonde angel, the main reason why she's so hung up on her is because of the way that she looks at her. No one has ever looked at her that way before; like she's some sort of specimen that's just waiting to be discovered. She likes it. She likes how it feels to have someone wanting to know her more and not because they've heard of Game of Clones before they even knew her, not because she was sorta famous, and not because some guy is trying to prove his masculinity by turning her straight.

Delphine wants to know her more because she does. And she looks at her like she has stars all over her body. That. Mostly that.

Cosima sighs. The thoughts clouding her mind are killing her. But Cosima tries her best to rationalize things. Maybe Delphine fell asleep last night. Maybe Delphine is busy now. Maybe Delphine is with Jason and they're doing things that are keeping her from responding. She blanches at the last thought. That's even worse than her previous considerations.

"Cosima?"

She groans, "What?"

"Open the door,"

She doesn't want to. She wants to be alone. But she doesn't want to be pathetic over a girl she met the night before. So she stands up and unlocks her door, letting Alison in.

"Hey," her sister says.

"Hi," she replies, plopping back on her bed.

"What's up?"

"What?"

"Don't lie to me Cosima,"

"I'm not lying."

"What aren't you telling us?"

Cosima doesn't answer. She doesn't want to tell anyone. She doesn't want to say that she's down in the dumps because a girl she likes –and met just a day ago- is possibly homophobic. God, even it sounds pathetic in her head. But Alison is looking at her with genuine concern and she cannot lie to her.

"Remember that girl I met at the battle?"

"Delphine, right?"

"How do you know?"

"Helena told us about it yesterday."

"Well, yeah, her."

"What about her?"

"I dunno. I… I think I like her."

"So what's the problem?"

"It's been a day,"

"You've fallen faster than that, Cos. What's the real problem?"

Cosima sighs and buries her face in her pillow. "I told her that I'm gay and now she isn't talking to me,"

Alison furrows her brows and thinks before she says anything. To be honest, she doesn't know what to say. She doesn't want to be the giver of false hope, but neither did she want her sister to feel bad. So she purses her lips and takes Cosima to her arms instead. Cosima rests her head on Alison's shoulder and sighs.

"She has a boyfriend, you know," Cosima says when she pulls back.

"Oh honey, that makes things even more complicated."

"I know."

"You know I'd support you in this, right? But it's pretty obvious that Delphine…well she -,"

"I know."

Alison hugs her again and pats her back.

"We'll be here if you need us, okay?" Cosima nods in response and Alison gets out of the room.

Maybe from the beginning, Cosima knew that she didn't have a chance. Maybe she knew even then that this is was inevitable. But what she knows is that there is something about the way that Delphine looks at her, and the way that she smiles and laughs whenever they are together, that makes Cosima think that there is something more –that Delphine might feel something for her as well. Or maybe it's just her and her ridiculous -but obviously true- belief that she's irresistible.


	9. Chapter 9

**chapter ix**

_It means that I'm gay, Delphine._

_-Ah. Alright_

_Does that bother you?_

_-No, _Delphine types in but she deletes it. She doesn't want to say that it doesn't because it does, not for any homophobic reason. She laughs at herself when she asks why. It's not like she unconsciously wishes Cosima to be gay. And it's definitely not like she's thanked French Jesus that Cosima is. She gulps.

She doesn't know how to respond. She can't say no because she doesn't want to lie. She can't say yes because it might give Cosima the wrong impression –even if she tries to explain. _How can I explain something that even I do not understand, _Delphine thinks.

So she places her cell on her chest and thinks of a reply. She thinks long and hard.

She falls asleep.

* * *

Delphine wakes up in shambles the following day. She only has fifteen minutes until her first class begins. She only has three classes today and she doesn't want to be late for any of them. She berates herself for forgetting to set her alarm. She moves in a fast motion, only grabbing her bag and books, completely neglecting to put on make-up, or eat breakfast or even drink coffee. She rushes out the door and hails a cab to school, forgetting her cell that now rests under her pillow.

Delphine runs to her classroom and arrives there in record time. She catches her breath and sits on the farthest chair on the left.

The lecture finishes early and Delphine decides to go to a nearby diner to eat breakfast. She ambles out the classroom when a familiar voice calls out to her.

"Delphine!"

She turns around.

"Jason,"

"Hi babe," the boy says, kissing Delphine's forehead. "Where are you going?"

"I uhm, I'm going out to eat,"

"Oh okay. I haven't had a good breakfast in a few days," he says and Delphine assumes that he is inviting himself. She sighs and then nods. Maybe Jason's presence could help her…in whatever this is that she needs help with.

The pair start walking outside the campus when Jason says, "I've been calling you earlier this morning. Did you get any of my texts?"

And that is when Delphine starts rummaging inside her bag that she realizes that she's left her cell phone in her apartment. More importantly, she remembers failing to respond to Cosima. She recalls what they've been talking about before she fell asleep and then she gasps. _Shit. _

"I have to get back to my apartment," she says but Jason doesn't let go of her hand.

"Why?"

"I left my cell."

"It doesn't matter. I'm here now. Unless -,"

Delphine raises her brows at what Jason is insinuating. She makes a face that's almost too defensive that Jason hints that something is wrong. But before he could say something else, Delphine cuts him off.

"I'm expecting a call from my mother,"

He stares at her, as if weighing what she said. "Your mom calls me when you don't pick up. It's fine," he replies.

Delphine doesn't know what to say. Jason does have a point. Whenever she's unavailable, her maman usually calls Jason to check up on her. _Merde. _

"I still need my cell. My…bio lab partner might call me to update me on our experiment. I have so many notes on my phone that I-,"

Jason shuts her up with a kiss and it usually sweeps the French blonde off of her feet. But now she's simply standing in front of him, her lips unmoved as if she's merely waiting for Jason to finish his big romantic gesture. Jason, fortunately, does not notice her passiveness.

"Hey, baby, relax. It's a good day. Stop worrying about schoolwork. Let's just go to the diner, eat a good breakfast, and then we'll get your cellular, alright?"

Delphine wants to say no, to tell him that getting her cellular and replying to Cosima is more important than eating breakfast. But then again, why? It's not like Cosima is waiting for her response. It's not like she owes Cosima an explanation to anything. Delphine falls asleep while texting Jason all the time. But then again, Cosima isn't Jason. And Jason isn't Cosima. And unlike when she's with Cosima, she forgets about her boyfriend; she doesn't forget about Cosima now that she's holding Jason's hand and is walking out the campus to a nearby diner.

* * *

"What can I get you?" the waitress says as she leans on their table. She gives Jason a wink which makes Delphine rolls her eyes. Unlike before, she doesn't have the urge to hold Jason's hand and remind the girls around them that she's his girlfriend. She merely lets it slide. She's too tired to even care. In fact, she doesn't think she cares at all anymore.

"We'll have pancakes," he responds and Delphine's blood boils.

She doesn't know why. Jason usually orders for the both of them all the time since he's already memorized her usual orders. She's gotten used to it; Jason speaking for her, for the both of them. And she usually finds it romantic that he knows these details about her. So she doesn't understand why this specific moment is irking her.

"No, I'll have the club sandwich, and a mug of coffee please," she says and Jason raises his brows.

"You usually order pancakes," he says.

"Well maybe I want to try something new. Maybe I'm tired of getting the same thing over and over again. Maybe I'd like to try their club sandwich. Maybe I'm tired of pancakes," she replies nonchalantly but Jason knows that there is something off.

Delphine's face stiffens when she realizes the exact meaning of her words. She dissociates them. She's talking about pancakes and club sandwiches, not a certain boy and a certain dreadlocked girl.

"Delphine, are you—are we okay?"

"I don't know Jason, are we?"

And they both eat their breakfast in silence when the waitress brings their orders to the table.

* * *

Delphine reluctantly kisses Jason's cheek when he walks her to her apartment after her last class. She had two more after their little trip to the diner and all of the subjects she had today were majors. It's pretty safe to say that Delphine is exhausted. She doesn't know though, if her brain is damaged now because of all the lessons they've discussed during class or if it is because she hasn't stopped thinking about her cellphone and the fact that she feels uneasy because she hasn't replied to Cosima. She really wishes that the girl doesn't think that Delphine has had a change of heart about their budding friendship because of her confession. Or maybe Delphine _did have_ a change of heart but in a different direction.

No. Delphine berates herself. She can't think about that. She's not...is she? She snaps out of her thoughts when Jason squeezes her hand.

"I love you," he says.

"I love you," she whispers although she's not sure if she means it anymore. No. Of course she means it. Jason is her boyfriend and she loves him. She does.

She kisses Jason's cheek again. They've talked about their little argument at the diner and although she knows that Jason knows that there is something wrong, he doesn't bring it up. Instead, he blames the stress radiating through both of them because of schoolwork. She thanks him internally for that because she doesn't want to fight, especially when she's unsure of why she's angry all of the sudden. She just really wants to get her phone and apologize to Cosima for replying so terribly late. God, why does she keep thinking about Cosima?

She rushes to her room and finds her cell under her pillow. There aren't any texts from Cosima, just missed calls and unread messages from Jason and her bio partner.

She clicks on her conversation with Cosima and reads the last messages they've sent to each other.

_It means that I'm gay, Delphine._

_-Ah. Alright_

_Does that bother you?_

She hurriedly types in:

-_Bonjour Cosima. I am so sorry for replying to you now. I fell asleep last night and I forgot my cell in my apartment. To answer your question: no, I am not at all bothered. I hope my late response to you did not make you think otherwise. I hope to hear from you. _

Delphine waits. Her cell jangles after a few minutes. A reply.

_Bonjour to you too, madame. It's no biggie. I was really busy the entire day so I didn't really check my phone if you've replied or not. Thank you for the unconditional love though. _

Delphine lets out a strained breath that she didn't realize she's been holding since the night before. She types in

_-You are very much welcome. _

_So…how was you day?_

Delphine giggles. And she knows, she figures out, that this girl couldn't be any more irresistible.


	10. Chapter 10

**chapter x**

Cosima lies awake in her bed, her cell on her hand, still waiting for Delphine to reply. She thinks it's pathetic. She's been like this with another girl before and she's vowed never to act the same way again. But Delphine isn't like the other girls. And she's most especially not like _that_ specific girl. Delphine is different, she tells herself. And that's exactly why Cosima is acting all ridiculous. _Just an hour more, _she thinks to herself as she yawns. If Delphine doesn't reply still, then she's sure that Delphine is just like the rest of them. She's sure that Delphine is actually homophobic and not like the girl she's been fantasizing about. _Fantasizing? No. Fuck. I mean, not the girl I think her to be. Yeah, that's the right term for it, _Cosima thinks. She's never fantasized about her. Really.

It takes half an hour before Cosima realizes that she's actually really sleepy and she thinks that yeah, maybe Delphine isn't who she thinks she is. Maybe everything was just an illusion. Maybe it was all just in her head. Cosima thanks science that it's just been two days. Because if it'd been weeks, then she's sure that she wouldn't be able to bounce back from this preposterous crush she has on the girl easily. It's when she closes her eyes that she hears her cell jangle. She takes the phone, not really expecting that her sender is non-other-than the French girl.

-_Bonjour Cosima. I am so sorry for replying to you now. I fell asleep last night and I forgot my cell in my apartment. To answer your question: no, I am not at all bothered. I hope my late response to you did not make you think otherwise. I hope to hear from you. _

And just like that, a new surge of hope rises from Cosima's toes and onto the top of head. All of the sudden, the thought of slumber isn't with her anymore. It's pathetic really. But Delphine has that effect on her.

She tells herself that she wouldn't reply, if only to show Delphine that she hasn't been waiting all day for her. She isn't that desperate to talk to the blonde, she tells herself. But of course, she finds herself quickly typing in a response.

_Bonjour to you too, madame. It's no biggie. I was really busy the entire day so I didn't really check my phone if you've replied or not. Thank you for the unconditional love though. _

She mentally slaps herself for lying. Of course she's been desperately waiting for Delphine's message but she wouldn't admit that.

_-You are very much welcome. _

She thinks of a response to ease the tension. She just wants to forget her thoughts and doubts. Of course Delphine is the girl that Cosima thinks she is. Kind. Amazing. Still straight, but at least she's not a dick about her sexuality.

She types in,

_So…how was you day?_

* * *

It is the day after and Cosima is alone in the library, searching for biology books on the farthest part of the circulation shelves. Her bio professor had given their class a research assignment that is due in three weeks and Cosima wants to finish it immediately as to make sure she doesn't have any homework for the weekend. Their band is going to play in a friend's party and she wants to be free of any school load before then. She takes a copy of 'Biology: Concepts and Connections' and another bio book by Bhatia. She takes the hardbacks on her table and promptly begins on her paper when she feels a hand rest on her shoulder.

"Bonjour Cosima,"

She doesn't have to turn around to guess who it is. That sultry voice and beautiful accent could only belong to one girl.

"Hello Delphine," she says, although never taking her eyes from her paper. She needs to focus right now, but the hand on her shoulder isn't helping.

"Mr. Baxter's assignment?" Delphine asks as she takes a seat beside the girl.

"Yeah, wait, how did you know?"

"Some of my friends take biology with him," she replies.

"I see,"

The pair shares the silence together and Cosima cannot help but feel content. Usually, she likes talking and sharing stories with people. But sitting alone with Delphine in the library while she does her homework seems fine too. Cosima begins drawing an illustration of the kreb cycle when she notices that Delphine has pulled out a book from her bag. It's torn and beaten on the sides but Cosima could still make out the letters forming the title of the book. _Anna Karenina._

"Tolstoy," Cosima says and Delphine's head whips towards her direction.

"You've read it?"

"Yeah, literature book report last sem," she explains.

"It's beautiful isn't it?"

"You've finished it?"

"I've reread it thrice now," Delphine says.

"He stepped down, trying not to look long at her, as if she were the sun, yet he saw her, like the sun, even without looking," Cosima quotes and Delphine finds herself giggling.

Cosima pauses for a while. And she thinks, maybe she's Vronsky, maybe Delphine is Anna, and maybe, just maybe, Cosima is looking at her like the sun. And then she remembers that Anna is a married woman and yeah, the story kinda fits her situation right now, doesn't it?

She shakes the thought from her head, because no, Delphine isn't going to jump off on the rails of a train station and die.

"What's your favorite quote?" Cosima asks to make conversation.

Delphine thinks long and hard and Cosima likes the way Delphine licks her lips and looks up in concentration, trying to remember those specific words that will probably say much about her.

"But the law of loving others could not be discovered by reason, because it is unreasonable," Delphine finally says, her eyes locked onto Cosima's and the brunette finds her breath catching on her throat. She doesn't understand why, maybe it's just her, maybe it's all in her head just like everything possibly is but the way that Delphine said the quote, the way that she's staring at her now makes Cosima feel like there's a substance to that text. She feels like there's something more. But of course there couldn't be.

"It is," Cosima finds herself responding.

"Have you ever felt like that Cosima?"

"Like what?"

"Have you ever just looked at a person and know that you've fallen in love with them? And you can't understand why out of all of the people, why that certain person? And you just can't stop thinking about it because…because it's irrational and we are people of science and we are empirical. But have you ever just felt so pathetic because a certain person causes you feelings of utter uncertainty?"

"Gnawing you whole because it's inconvenient and bothersome and just plainly, completely unreasonable?" Cosima looks at Delphine's eyes and _what the fuck is this? _She's forgotten all about her homework because she's lost in that pool of brown orbs and everything else is just background noise. She's looking for something in those eyes, searching for something that's just going to make her heart ache even more because she knows it's not there. _It's just been days, Cosima._ _It's not there. And even if it took months, it would never be there. _

But then, miraculously, she finds it. And Cosima doesn't think she knows how to breathe anymore because there it is. There it is and she's not imagining it. She really isn't. She doesn't need to go through experiments and theories because she knows and although she's uncertain of what it implies, its there.

It's there. That glint in her eyes that's the source of all her hope. So she takes the risk. It's just been days but who the hell cares, there is no why in love. And there definitely isn't a when.

She smiles and she looks at Delphine in the eyes before she breathes out, "I have."


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N1: **there are a few french words in this chapter. translations are on the end note.

* * *

**chapter xi**

Delphine is pretty sure that the beautiful girl reaching for hardbound biology books is Cosima. _No one could pull off ponytailed dreadlocks like that. _

She ambles towards the brunette when she sees that she's settled on one of the tables. She didn't want to at first, because she didn't want to seem like a creep. The duo had texted 'til the early morning. And this was after all, only their third or fourth day being friends. _God, I sound like a weirdo, _she thinks. _Who counts how long they've known a person? _

Delphine decides to approach Cosima. She places her hand on her shoulder and she feels the girl tense. The blonde feels a satisfaction at this. She doesn't know why, but she likes it when people squirm beneath her…Delphine shakes her head, that thought didn't sound right.

"Bonjour Cosima,"

"Hello Delphine," the girl answers but she doesn't remove her eyes from her paper. Delphine studies it. She's seen some of her friends from another bio class doing the same homework.

"Mr. Baxter's assignment?" she asks as she takes a seat beside the brunette.

"Yeah, wait, how did you know?"

"Some of my friends take biology with him," Delphine replies.

"I see,"

Delphine studies Cosima for a moment, enchanted by the way the girl's forehead creases when she's concentrating. She sees so much of herself in the girl. She's like that when she works as well. She doesn't like being disturbed. She likes the silence when she's focusing on something, so she doesn't talk. Instead, she enjoys the solitary moment she shares with Cosima. She pulls out a book from her bag. It's torn on the sides. It's really old, but it's one of her favorites. _Anna Karenina._

"Tolstoy," Cosima says and Delphine whips her head towards the girl's direction. She's never pegged Cosima to read classics.

"You've read it?" she asked.

"Yeah, literature book report last sem," Cosima explains.

"It's beautiful isn't it?"

"You've finished it?"

"I've reread it thrice now," Delphine replies.

"He stepped down, trying not to look long at her, as if she were the sun, yet he saw her, like the sun, even without looking," Cosima quotes and Delphine finds herself giggling, if only to hide the blush that's slowly creeping up her cheeks.

God, if Jason quoted classics to her, she would've fallen in love with him faster. _Not that she's falling in love with Cosima, _she abruptly tells herself. _She isn't. _But if this isn't love then what is it? What the hell is this she's feeling? _Pourquoi diable est-ce que je me sens comme ça ? Je ne connais cette fille que depuis quelques jours!*_

"What's your favorite quote?" Cosima asks and Delphine is pulled away from her thoughts.

Delphine thinks. She likes a lot of quotes. For one, she loves it when Vronsky says 'there is no why in love,' because it's true. But she says something else and the only time she realizes the implications of what she says is right after the words spill from her mouth.

"But the law of loving others could not be discovered by reason, because it is unreasonable," Delphine says, looking at Cosima in the eye and she swears that she sees the brunette catch her breath. She doesn't understand why but the way she's said it seems like she means something else. And maybe she does. Maybe she does mean something else. Maybe all this time, Cosima means something more to her than she lets on. And she can't hide it any longer. She just can't. Because if she denies it any longer, she's sure that she's going to combust.

"It is," Cosima responds and Delphine is sure that her cheeks are on fire.

_Cosima, stop looking at me like that. Stop that. Whatever you're doing, stop it. You're not helping, _Delphine tells herself but she doesn't want Cosima to stop. Whatever Cosima is doing, it's making Delphine feel alive. And it's the happiest she's felt in a while. She's felt something similar to this. When Jason was still courting her, was still charming her to get to her, she felt like she was the most beautiful girl on the planet. But it wouldn't be right to compare Jason with Cosima, because the girl isn't like her boyfriend. _Boyfriend, _she reminds herself. She has a boyfriend. And he's a great guy. He's nice. And he's charming. He charms the pants off of her (and all the other girls in campus and he's probably cheating on her with two or three other girls). No. Cosima isn't looking at her like she's the most beautiful girl in the planet. Cosima is a blackhole and she's consuming Delphine whole and no matter what the blonde tells herself, she cannot stop. She can't. So she blurts out,

"Have you ever felt like that Cosima?"

"Like what?"

Oh and god, Delphine cannot stop herself. She can't. _J'irai en enfer pour ça, mais bordel. J'aime cette fille. Je l'aime. Vraiment. Plus de faux-semblant.**_

"Have you ever just looked at a person and know that you've fallen in love with them? And you can't understand why out of all of the people, why that certain person? And you just can't stop thinking about it because…because it's irrational and we are people of science and we are intelligent but have you ever just felt so pathetic because a certain person just causes you certain feelings of uncertainty?"

Delphine smacks herself mentally. She meant to deliver a smooth speech but all she did was ramble. _What a…what's the term? Word vomit?_

"Gnawing you whole because it's inconvenient and bothersome and just plainly, completely unreasonable?" Cosima replies and Delphine swears that Cosima is looking at her differently, like the brunette is searching for something. Silence overwhelms them and it's deafening. Cosima is looking at Delphine in the way that she's never looked at her before. Delphine doesn't know what the girl is doing but she's drowning in her eyes. She's completely hypnotized and paralyzed and she swears that at that moment she's forgetting how to breathe. And then Cosima's face beams as if she's found what she's looking for. And it dawns upon Delphine that Cosima knows. _Cosima knows that she likes her. Merde. Merde. _

She panics. But then all of her anxiety dies down when Cosima smiles and breathes out, "I have."

Delphine's heart practically tears off her chest and jumps off to Cosima's at that moment and then Delphine thinks, _why is her heart still here? Shouldn't it be with Jason? No. It came back to her broken and bruised long ago._

Delphine doesn't know what to reply. She doesn't want to assume that the look on Cosima's face means she feels the same way, although there's a longing in Delphine's heart that wishes the other girl does.

"What are you doing Friday night?" Delphine blurts out instead.

"Uh-, nothing important," Cosima replies.

"Great."

"What's so great about that?"

"You could watch a movie with me,"

Cosima raises a brow and smirks. "My, my, are you asking me out on a date mademoiselle?"

Delphine blushes. _A date? _

"Non, non, we could…ah, how do Americans say it? Hang out?"

"I see," Cosima grins, "I'll have to check my schedule though, to be sure,"

Delphine playfully smacks the girl's arm.

"Alright. Friday,"

"Bon,"

"You're making me melt with all your French," Cosima says.

_Good, _Delphine wants to say. But instead, she smiles.

* * *

Delphine and Cosima part ways after an hour or two. Cosima has a class and Delphine had to meet Jason. _Jason, _Delphine thinks. _God. I have a boyfriend, _she reminds herself again. Why does she keep forgetting?

She ambles towards the open court and sees Jason playing basketball with his friends. She recognizes three of them. The blonde one in the blue shirt is Luke, who also happens to be the drummer of Jason's band. The two others are Gerard and Nate.

"Hey love," Jason says as she approaches them. _Love? When has he ever called me love? _Delphine thinks.

"Hallo," she replies. If the way she's said that was stiff and forced, Jason has noticed. He leans down to kiss Delphine but the blonde turns her head so he ends up kissing his cheek.

"Is there something wrong? You're usually happy when you see me," Jason says and Delphine doesn't know what to answer. _I'm not happy anymore, _she wants to say but that wouldn't be right.

"Non, non, I am happy. My brain is just ah—damaged from all of that research work,"

"Research work?"

"Oui. I was in the library before I came here, remember?"

"Oh, right," Jason replies but Delphine knows he's not buying any of it.

"So? Should we go?"

"To where?"

"I texted you hours ago. We're going out, remember?"

"Oh yes, I remember," Delphine responds but she doesn't know what he's talking about.

"Great. I'll get changed. Wait for me," he says and then jogs off to get his bag.

Delphine walks towards the benches by the court and takes her cell from her purse. Her home screen had a notification which read: _7 unread messages from Jason, _one of which had something about them going out for an early dinner.

And that's exactly when Delphine realizes that Jason is no longer the center of her attention. She no longer looks for him, thinks about him, wonders where he is and why he's not texting back. She realizes that she doesn't care anymore because now all she cares about is Cosima. But she can't. She likes her. She does. But what about Jason? She can't hurt him. She's not that kind of person. But what is she doing?

She resigns her head on her palms, takes a deep breath and shuddery exhales. _I don't know._

* * *

**A/N2**: special thanks to the wonderful reader who corrected the french words in this chapter. here are the translations:

*why the hell do I feel like this? i've only known the girl for a few days!

**i'm going to hell for this but damn it! i like this girl. i do. no more pretending.

i do hope that you all enjoyed the chapter! and i also hope that you understand why delphine is having an internal debate about her feelings for cosima and jason. sending out thanks and hugs to my readers, reviewers and those who added this to their favorites. you are all greatly loved and appreciated!


	12. Chapter 12

**chapter xii**

_-There is this movie that I would like to watch. It is called Love, Rosie. Friday night, yes?_

_You're really a hopeless romantic kind of girl, aren't you? Ha ha. Alright. Should we meet at the movie house?_

_-Yes, we'll meet at 7 pm. _

_Alright. See you then!_

Cosima rereads their text message and she groans. _Why did she agree to this? _Then she answers herself. She agreed because no matter how much she denies it, she likes Delphine. She may not be sure if Delphine likes her the same way but she saw that glint in Delphine's eyes when they were in the library and that is why she's risking it. She throws her cell on her bed and then looks for something pretty to wear. If she's going to try and get the girl then she might as well look nice.

Cosima finally decides to wear a black sleeveless top and a black pencil skirt underneath a red coat. She wears stockings just because she feels like doing so.

Just as she is strapping on her boots, her cell jangles. It is a text from Delphine.

_See you in twenty minutes._

* * *

Cosima stands outside the movie house. She checks her wristwatch; its quarter to seven. She shouldn't have come early. Now she's scared that Delphine would change her mind and not show up. But why would she? She's the one who invited Cosima to watch a movie, right? Cosima takes a breath. _This isn't a date so chill, _she tells herself. _Oh god this isn't a date so why am I going to give her flowers? _Cosima's eyes widen when she realizes that she's been holding a little bouquet of lilies. _God damn it Cosima! Lilies? Of all the flowers, you'd give her lilies?_

"Shit," she mutters. She's about to throw it into a bin on the sidewalk when she sees Delphine approaching. She freezes.

Delphine is wearing a black parka coat above black leggings and a plain white tee. Her curls are cascaded on her shoulders and she's smiling that megawatt smile that Cosima oh so loves. _Celestial _is the only thing that comes to Cosima's mind as she stares at the woman approaching her.

"Wow," Cosima breathes out, being unable to help herself. "You're so beautiful."

Delphine blushes but she hopes that Cosima hasn't noticed.

"Merci, you look wonderful as well Cosima,"

"I look like a rag compared to you," she chuckles nervously. Delphine looks down at her hand and she feels herself blush. Cosima hands the other girl the flowers, her left hand scratching the back of her neck as she thinks of something to say. "I, uh, these are for you," _Smooth._

Delphine's eyes shine as she takes the flowers and there's that glint again. "Merci,"

They stand there in silence for a while. Cosima takes in the sight of the woman in front of her before Delphine finally takes her wrist and brings her along to the ticket booth.

Delphine begins to rummage her purse for her wallet when Cosima stops her, "What are you doing?"

"Looking for my wallet?"

"Why?"

Delphine looks confused, "so that I could pay for our ticket,"

"Oh no, no, no. I'm paying for our tickets," Cosima says matter-of-factly.

"What? No, I invited you. I should be the one paying for both of our tickets."

"No Delphine, I insist." Cosima hands the lady behind the counter her money and receives the two tickets given to her.

"You shouldn't have," Delphine pouts.

"Don't pout puppy. It's fine," Cosima says and Delphine giggles.

"Alright then mon ami,"

Once the pair had bought popcorns and drinks (sponsored by Delphine because she insisted on paying for their food), they settle on the seats on the middle row. It's a safe place, Cosima thinks, because if they sit at the back they'd be surrounded by teenagers who don't really care about the movie. Cosima turns around to glance at the back row and yes, there are teenagers eating each other's faces. The brunette blushes as an image of her and Delphine kissing pops into her mind. _Shit, _she thinks. _She shouldn't be thinking about this when Delphine is sitting next to her. _But then she thinks, _is Delphine thinking about kissing her as well? No. No. Shit Cosima, stop._

"Are you okay Cosima?" Delphine asks.

"Oh uh-, yeah, I'm totally fine."

The theatre lights turn off and the screen comes alive. The sound reverberates all over the room but all Cosima can hear is the sound of her heart beating wildly in her ribcage. All she can think about is the feeling of Delphine's lips touching her own. Her palms start to sweat. She looks to her side and sees Delphine's eyes fixed on the screen as she takes popcorn and bring it up to her mouth. _Her mouth. God. _

She tries her best but she can't take her eyes away from Delphine's mouth. The blonde licks her lips to remove the bits of salt on the corners which makes Cosima unconsciously lick her lips as well. _No, _Cosima tells herself. She strays her eyes away from Delphine and focuses on the screen just in time as the opening credits roll on and the movie begins.

And when the movie ended, Cosima learned one important thing: Delphine has the sexiest lips that she's ever dreamed of kissing.

* * *

"It was a rather touching story, non?"

"I don't want to be the rain on your parade but the movie was horrible,"

Delphine slaps Cosima's arm, "It was not horrible. You were just not paying attention,"

_Because I kept looking at you, _Cosima thinks of saying but stops herself just as she is about to. "Okay, so maybe the whole thing wasn't that bad."

"It was not bad at all," Delphine giggles as she loops her arm around Cosima's. "So…where are we going now?"

Cosima's brows rise up to her hairline. Here she thought they were just going to a movie.

"Well, we could take out Chinese food and hang on Felix's apartment's rooftop," the brunette suggests.

Delphine smiles at the prospect of spending more time with the other girl, "Alright."

The pair stops by a Chinese restaurant and head towards their next destination with take out bags on their hands. It is almost half past nine and Cosima is starving.

Once they reach Felix's apartment, Cosima sends a quick text to her friend and informs him about some things that she'll be borrowing. It's a Friday night which means that Felix isn't home. True enough, Cosima doesn't find him when she enters the apartment, using the key underneath the welcome mat. She takes a picnic blanket, a bottle of wine and some glasses before heading up the rooftop with Delphine.

Cosima sets up their dinner picnic and fills the glasses with wine. She doesn't bother with candles because this isn't a date. It doesn't seem that way to the brunette however, because the stars shining up above them are making the entire thing romantic.

The duo dig in their Chinese food and its quiet for a while before Delphine breaks the silence. They ask each other questions and they answer. They laugh and they talk about each other's lives, filling in the spaces of the things they haven't talked about before. It all comes naturally to them that they do not realize that they're done with their dinner and are now taking sips of their wine.

Delphine is the first to stand up. She leaves her bag on the picnic mat and walks by the edge of the rooftop. Cosima follows her with her glass in her hand.

Cosima and Delphine are admiring the view, enjoying the silence for a moment before Delphine asks something.

"So…how come you don't have a girlfriend," the French asks and it takes Cosima by surprise that she chokes.

Cosima clears her throat and puts her glass aside, "I uhm—I guess I haven't found someone who's caught my attention," the brunette answers but she's giving Delphine that look which sort of tells her to get a hint.

Delphine remains clueless however because she takes her glass and sips. Cosima is staring at the blonde's lips again and it forms a knot in her stomach. She can't handle it anymore: pretending to not feel anything when all of her unspoken desires are pouring down on her like angry rain. She looks at Delphine and she knows that whatever she's feeling is real. She really likes this girl. That's why she's here. That's why she's risking it. Cosima gulps, having a newfound courage igniting inside of her. She decides to venture on. _It's now or never_.

"Or maybe because the girl I like is seeing someone else," Cosima says, her eyes never leaving Delphine.

The blonde looks at her, searching for something in her eyes. Cosima guesses that Delphine has found whatever she's looking for because she stops drinking her wine and sets her glass aside.

Cosima steps forward, confidence plastered on her façade when deep inside her heart is pounding crazily.

"Cosima, we've had wine and we're not thinking clearly," Delphine tries to say as Cosima moves closer towards her. Their faces are mere inches apart and she can feel Cosima's breath on her cheek. Whatever she's trying to say, if she's trying to stop anything from happening, Cosima doesn't see it in Delphine's demeanor because the blonde stays still. Her eyes are fixed on the brunette's instead of backing off and telling her to stop. Delphine is fixed on her place like she's been glued.

Cosima's head is swirling. Maybe a glass of wine was too much. But she's on a roll now. She's not going to stop. She's not going to chicken out. Maybe she isn't thinking straight. But the words are out of her mouth before she thinks things through and her feet are moving forward until the tips of her toes are touching Delphine's.

"Don't you think it's time we admit what this is really about?" Cosima asks and before she knows it, she is leaning towards the blonde, cupping her cheeks and kissing her lips.

Cosima's been itching to do that all night. But Delphine isn't kissing her back. She pulls awayand sees Delphine's surprised expression. Delphine doesn't say anything. _Shit. I shouldn't have done that! Shit. Now I've ruined everything. Shit shit shit shit!_

Cosima searches for something in Delphine's eyes. She's looking for that glint but she doesn't find it. She feels her throat constrict and her stomach churn. God, she shouldn't have done that. She's about to apologize when Delphine moves from her spot.

"I should go," she says, grabbing her bag from the picnic blanket and walking away, not even bothering to look back at Cosima.


	13. Chapter 13

**chapter xiii**

Delphine stands on her spot unmoved, as if her feet have been cemented to the ground. She knows what's going to happen next. She can anticipate it in the way that Cosima's eyes are heavy-lidded, and in the way that the brunette is breathing so shallowly. Yet, Delphine cannot bring herself to move which brings her to ask herself, _does she want this to happen? _

Of course not.

She's not the type of girl who would kiss someone no matter how strongly she knows the attraction between them. She could help herself, she thinks. But she has tnow if this isn't some mirage. She has to know if a kiss from this girl would make her think of a Disney fireworks display the way a simple touch from her would bring shivers down her spine. She knows that she and Cosima have something. She's not dense. And she thinks, maybe kissing her would be some sort of solution. Maybe kissing Cosima would make her feel nothing and prove to her that his has all been nothing. Or maybe it could make her feel something that she'd finally understand why she wants to be so close to the girl.

"Cosima, we've had wine and we're not thinking clearly," Delphine tries to say but even she isn't convinced. She wants to stop this. She needs to stop this. She has a boyfriend and she's not that kind of person. No matter how many times she's sure that Jason has cheated on her, she's not going to cheat on him back. And this, the way that Cosima is nearing her, their breaths mingling on the small space between them, is already cheating because Delphine would be lying if she'd deny that she's been thinking about kissing the girl as well.

She's noticed the way that Cosima kept looking at her during their time at the cinemas. She can see through her peripherals how Cosima's eyes would dilate whenever she's looking at her and how Cosima would unconsciously lick her lips when she brings a piece of popcorn up to her mouth. She doesn't want to assume but even a blind person could tell that something was up. And she would be completely dishonest with herself if she'd say that she hasn't thought about what Cosima's lips would feel like against her own.

"Don't you think it's time we admit what this is really about?" Cosima asks and Delphine is sure that Cosima knows. They both know, they've just been pretending not to see what's in front of them. They have something…an understanding of some sorts. All Delphine is sure of is that there is an undeniable attraction between them; one that would rival that of magnets. Thus, before she can even think of something to say, Cosima cups her cheeks and kisses her on the lips and Delphine swears that she doesn't feel butterflies because she's feeling an entire fucking zoo causing a riot on the pit of her stomach.

She doesn't kiss Cosima back, however. She's still sober and she still knows what's right from wrong. She would never deny that fire between them but it still doesn't mean that she'd cheat on Jason.

Cosima pulls back and Delphine has to pretend that she did not enjoy that kiss. She has to keep a stoic façade because the moment she breaks her mask and lets Cosima see how utterly head over heels she is with her, she's sure that Cosima would kiss her again. And Delphine doesn't know if she can keep her morals by then. She's sure she'd kiss Cosima back.

Cosima looks at her in the eyes, looking like a lost puppy searching for something. Delphine tries to remain blank. She holds on to what is left of her sanity and before she even knows it, she's walking away.

"I should go," she says as she grabs her bag from the picnic mat and leaves.

Letting Cosima kiss her was probably the worst idea ever. If at first she thought it would serve as a solution, now she is keenly aware that it has caused her a huge problem. Because now, even as she's leaving, she can still feel Cosima's lips on hers and the way that they tasted like raspberries. And that feeling in her stomach? Well, Delphine is pretty sure that it won't calm down until she kisses Cosima again.

* * *

Delphine walks up to her apartment and stops short when she sees a bouquet of flowers by her doormat. She picks it up and reads the card. It says:

_I hope you had a good day. I miss you – Jason_

Delphine's stomach churns when she reads it again. She has a boyfriend but she's let someone else kiss her. And what's worse is that she enjoyed it and that she wants it to happen again.

She feels sick. She's witnessed enough cheating and lying in her life that she's promised herself that she'll never cause someone the pain of what that would bring. But here she is, already having broken her promise.

She enters her apartment, throws her bag on the couch and then walks over to her room. She slumps down on the bed. She brings her fingers up to her mouth and traces her lips. She could still feel the tingle of Cosima's kiss. It makes her smile. But at the same time, it causes her dread.

She remembers the first time that Jason has kissed her. They were dating for weeks then. It was the perfect moment. They were on a Ferris wheel and they kissed when their carriage reached the top. Jason's mouth tasted like chocolate ice cream. It was magical. When did it stop being magical? Was it the first time Delphine caught Jason exchanging numbers with a girl in a bar? Was it when Delphine saw Jason in his car with someone else? Was it when Jason called Delphine in the middle of the night and called her by a different name? Or was it when Delphine found someone else who brought the magic in her life?

No.

Delphine had fallen out of love with Jason long before Cosima arrived. And Delphine only stayed because she's patient and because Jason is cute and charming and she cannot say no. Now, however, with Cosima, she's beginning to see the light. She sees it because Cosima helped her.

Maybe Delphine had just been waiting for someone to show her how she deserved to be treated. But then again, that would be unfair for Cosima. She can't just leave Jason because she knows that Cosima is there to catch her. She wouldn't do that to Cosima; treat her like a rebound. She would never intentionally hurt the other girl.

But she can't deny her feelings for the girl any longer. And she can't pretend that she's still in love with her boyfriend.

Delphine sighs. She's in real deep shit and she doesn't know what to do. She knows that Jason had been playing her for a long time, but he's still trying. And he's still cute and charming. Delphine just has to find the courage to say no.

And then what? Would she date Cosima after breaking up with her boyfriend? _God. _She's sure about their spark, but she's not even sure if she's…bisexual. She knows that it's a spectrum and it would be wrong (as a scientist) to condemn the possibility without proper experimentation. But wouldn't that be wrong? Wouldn't it be unfair if she isn't sure of herself and she'd use Cosima to test the waters? What if in the end, this is all just a phase? Would she tell Cosima that she had only mistaken sheer curiosity for genuine feelings?

Delphine covers her eyes with her hands. She needs to think things through. She doesn't want to end up hurting Cosima. And she doesn't want to dive into something she isn't sure about.

The blonde takes her cellular from her bag and then dials her best friend's number. Her best friend, Claude, lives in France and Delphine is sure that Claude is probably asleep but she needs to talk to someone.

"Hallo?" says a groggy voice from the other line.

"Hallo, Claude? It's Delphine. Peut-on parler _(Can we talk)_?"

"Oui bien sûr. Que se passe-t-il _(Yes, of course. What is the matter)?_"

"Jason est triche sur moi. Il a été pendant un certain temps maintenant ... _(Jason is cheating on me. He has been for a while now...)_"

"Oh mon Dieu. Je savais dès le début que ce était un trou du cul _(Oh my god. I knew from the beginning that he was an asshole)_!"

Delphine lets out a shaky laugh and then says, "Yes, but that's not the problem."

"What is it then?" Claude answers, her accent thick.

"Je ai rencontré quelqu'un _(I met someone)._"

Claude gasps, "You met a new boy?"

Delphine shakes her head, "Non, Claude. I met a girl. And I really like her."

The line goes silent for a moment before a raspy voice answers, "_Merde._"

* * *

**A/N: **happy valentine's day readers! i apologize for the long wait. there might be mistakes regarding the french words (i used google translate for that). anyway, stay tuned!


	14. Chapter 14

**chapter xiv**

It's a Friday night and Cosima is hella bored.

She's been sitting on her computer chair, typing away scientific words and whatnots on her paper that's due in two weeks. Yup, that's Cosima for you: always two weeks ahead of homework. She's almost finished with her paper when she hears a knock on her bedroom door.

An unruly blonde head pokes inside.

"Sestra?"

"Yeah?" Cosima spins on her chair and faces Helena.

"The other sestras and brother sestra says we go to bar tonight. You should change," Helena replies as she takes in Cosima's plaid pajamas and green tank top.

"I don't -," Cosima begins to say but Sarah bursts inside her room and plops down on her bed.

"C'mon nerd, you've been surrounding yourself with school shite all week. You need to get a life,"

Cosima rolls her eyes.

"You know I'm beginning to think that all of this staying at home thing is because you and your girlfriend had a fight,"

Cosima's eyes widen and she squeaks, "She's not my girlfriend Sarah!"

"Yeah, but the blush on your cheeks tells me you want her to be," Sarah laughs and raises her clenched fist towards Helena, who in turns bumps it with her own. The two snicker and Cosima throws the nearest object that she could get a hold of: an eraser.

"Ow! Hey," Sarah yelps in between laughs. "Just get dressed nerd, we're gonna get drunk tonight,"

"And mom and dad?"

"Are asleep," Helena says, an evil grin plastering her face.

"Alright, alright. Give me five minutes," Cosima replies and Sarah and Helena wait for her in the living room.

At least she won't be bored anymore.

* * *

Sarah, Cosima, and Helena meet Felix outside the Metro. At the sight of them approaching, the over-muscular bouncer guarding the door smiles and lets them in. Felix and Sarah rush towards the bartender and sit on the available bar stools, Cosima and Helena following suit.

"Yo Harry, eight patrons here, yeah?" Sarah tells the bartender and he nods, sliding the shot glasses on the counter towards them.

By their fourth or possibly fifth glass, Helena grabs Felix to the dance floor, leaving the two sisters on the stools.

"So, care to share anything?"

"What?"

"What's going on between you and frenchie, Cos?" Sarah asks.

Cosima huffs, "There's nothing going on between me and Delphine."

"Yeah? Well you look so lovesick right now that if I wasn't your sister who cares about you, I would've laughed at your pathetic face," Sarah says, downing another shot.

"You? Care about me?"

"Oh c'mon, you know I do," Sarah grins and Cosima cannot help but smile too.

Sarah's never been good with feelings so she tries to show her concern in her own way. Cosima knows that her sister cares –which is probably the reason why Sarah brought her here in the first place, to talk about what's been obviously bothering her for the past few days. God knows she's been moping around at home lately and she isn't up for gigs as well –which, by the way, is very un-Cosima of her.

"It's only been two weeks Sar, there's nothing going on," Cosima tries again but Sarah looks at her with that _bullshit_ face and she knows that there's no way out of this. She's her sister, of course she'd know. She sighs, "We've been talking a lot the past week, seeing each other after school and hanging out at the café."

"So what's wrong with that?"

"The more I spend time with her…"

"…The more you fall in love with her," Sarah finishes her sentence for her. "And you can't have that 'cause she has a boyfriend."

"She has a boyfriend and she's so fucking straight Sarah. What the fuck was I thinking?"

"You weren't thinking at all," her sister replies as she waves her hand at the bartender, signaling two more shots. "So what's going on now?"

"Oh you know, just me avoiding her at all costs."

"Must suck,"

"Sucks a lot, to be honest,"

"So you're keeping yourself busy to numb yourself, yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Is it working?"

"Not at all," Cosima sighs and downs the glass of tequila in front of her. She doesn't even bother with salt or lemon. She thinks she's gotten used to the burning sensation down her throat.

It's true. Cosima and Delphine had been hanging out for the past couple of weeks. It's just been two weeks, she knows but she's so taken by her. It's ridiculous. Every moment they're together makes Cosima forget that Delphine has a boyfriend, makes her forget that she doesn't even know if Delphine is into girls as well. She thinks of their previous encounters and even she could admit that Delphine tolerates her when she flirts. She even flirts back as well –or was it just Cosima being unable to distinguish politeness with coquetting. She shakes her head. _God. _

Now, she's been constantly avoiding Delphine, if only to try to remind her that she's got better things to worry about than think about a beautiful French girl who's apparently too straight to even notice her advances.

It all happened last Friday, really. She doesn't want to talk about it but that's when all of this shitty overthinking happened. She's been spending time with the French and yeah, they've been having a blast. She'd often forget about the big elephant in the room but she'd bounce back. She's a smart girl, she knows her limits. Until that Friday night. That shitty Friday night.

"What really happened last Friday, Cos?"

"No, I'm not talking about that," Cosima says as she slips out of her chair and ambles towards the rest room.

Cosima washes her face on the sink. Her vision is beginning to blur; perhaps she's had too much to drink.

The dreadlocked girl looks at herself in the mirror and then she remembers everything that had happened during their not-date.

She could envision Delphine in her coat, her hair cascading beautifully down on the side of her neck. She could imagine how Delphine had smiled when she had given her flowers. And then she sees Delphine's face, a meter away from hers where they sat in the cinemas. She feels their hands brushing against each other. And then she remembers how the stars looked that night above Felix' apartment, how they seemed so dull in comparison to Delphine's eyes. She feels her heart racing when she recalls the look on Delphine's face when she held it, when she reached forward.

She traces her lips. It feels like Delphine's had been tattooed on hers. It's marked her, and it has become something that cannot be erased.

Cosima sighs. She only wishes that Delphine had wanted it as much as she did. She wishes that Delphine doesn't regret that night because no matter how shitty it ended, Cosima doesn't.

She wishes she didn't kiss her, however, because now it feels like everything is falling apart. Their two weeks worth of friendship that felt like something more seems like its coming to an end and Cosima doesn't want to lose that. Sarah's right; she didn't think.

She got so overwhelmed by her feelings that they clouded her judgment –which is very uncharacteristic of her.

She chuckles mockingly. She's supposed to be scientific and organized and systematic and highly empirical. She's a science wiz for Aristotle's sake! And yet here she is now, looking laughably pathetic because of one time she didn't think and now she's suffering the consequences.

_A knock on the restroom door._

"Hey nerd? C'mon man, get outta there."

"I'll be out in a sec, okay?"

"You sure you're fine?"

"Yep, A-okay," Cosima answers.

Yet no matter how much she tells herself that she's okay or that she'll be fine (because when has she never been fine?), she knows that it's not true. Even she cannot convince herself.

The only thing that can make her feel alright now is knowing that she and Delphine are fine –are hopefully, still friends.


	15. Chapter 15

**chapter xv**

It is a wonderful Saturday morning. The sun is shining but the weather is slightly windy. She can hear the usual bustling of the people outside and the rustles of the leaves on the trees as a background noise.

It's a perfect day for a walk.

It's no ordinary Saturday for Delphine however. She's been counting the days and this day marks the third week that she's known Cosima.

She first met Cosima two Saturdays ago during the battle of the bands at Metro. And then on that week's Friday, just six days after they had met, Cosima had kissed her. Now, a week has passed and the feel of Cosima's lips is still fresh on Delphine's memory.

Delphine sighs. Three weeks and already this girl has boggled her mind more than anyone ever has and probably ever will.

She's never been this bothered by a girl before. Never. So Delphine knows that Cosima isn't like any other girl. And then it hits her.

Maybe Delphine had felt a different vibe with Cosima when they met. She knew it the moment she saw her on stage. But she didn't know what those feelings were. And then the night of the contest, during the after party, those feelings slowly crept up on her and made themselves known. Maybe Delphine had discovered what those feelings are precisely on the day that she and Cosima had met. Maybe she had realized them then but she never acknowledged them, kept suppressing them and pushing them back to her unconscious because it isn't right.

Yet now, tracing her finger on her lips, remembering Cosima's face when she reached forward and leaned in, she cannot think of why it's deemed wrong. Delphine thinks that, in all honesty, being with Cosima can never be anything but right.

Delphine snatches her cell from underneath her pillow and thinks about calling the brunette. Her thumbs hover above the device when she realizes that Cosima had been avoiding her for a week now. Obviously, Cosima wouldn't answer her call as well. Whatever it is that she wants to say to the other girl; she has to say it personally.

Delphine changes into a t-shirt and a pair of pants, grabs her jacket from the hanger, takes her phone and wallet and heads out.

It's a wonderful Saturday morning.

It's a perfect day to tell someone how you really feel.

She doesn't know where Cosima is now. She doesn't know where to start looking for her. But as she is walking, she finds her feet dragging the rest of her towards the café.

She opens the door and the bell chimes above her.

Behind the counter is Scott, taking a boy's order. As soon as he finishes writing it down on his pad, he looks up and sees Delphine.

"Hey Delphine," he greets.

"Hello Scott. Do you know where Cosima is?"

Scott opens his mouth but then closes it, like he wants to say something but then remembers that he isn't allowed to disclose any information. Delphine knows what's up.

"Look, Scott, I do not know if you know what's going on but I really have to talk to Cosima. I know she told you not to tell me because she's been avoiding me all week but it's really important."

Scotts sighs in defeat, "Alright, alright. But if she asks how you knew, don't tell her that I told you. She's at their clubhouse."

"Clubhouse?"

"Yeah, it's sort of like a little place where they have band practice."

"And where is this clubhouse?"

Scott takes a piece of paper from his pad and begins to write an address. He hands it to Delphine and says, "I hope you guys work things out."

"I hope so too."

Delphine thanks Scott and immediately heads out. She takes a look at the paper, thanking the stars that she's familiar with the street.

She starts walking, straight at first and then turns left on the intersection two blocks away from the café.

Delphine doesn't hurry. She takes her time, gathering her thoughts on what she would say when she'd get there. Would she tell Cosima that she enjoyed the kiss? Would she tell her that she likes her? Wait. Does Cosima even like her that way?

When Delphine had rushed out of her apartment, she was intent on speaking with Cosima about what had happened last Friday. But now that she is on her way to where Cosima is, she's all of the sudden lost in her thoughts. She didn't have a plan. She didn't know what she would say. She didn't want to be spontaneous, she needed to be organized. If she'd do an impromptu speech, all she would manage would be a word vomit and that would not be good.

She begins thinking of what she could say. She says them out loud, but none of them seem like the right words to say.

Finally, she reaches her destination.

The place looks like a newly renovated shack. It isn't too large, but big enough to house some people and their musical equipment. She walks up to the front door and sees Cosima and her sisters through one of the large windows.

_This is it, _she thinks.

Delphine raises a hand up and knocks on the wooden door. It opens and reveals one of the sisters. Her hair is tied back in a neat ponytail with her full bangs covering her forehead.

"Uhm, Cosima, it's for you," the girl says. Delphine guesses its Alison.

"What? I don't remember inviting someone over," Cosima walks over to the front door and stops short when she sees who it is.

Delphine offers a sheepish grin before she says, "Hello."

Everything is awkward at first. Delphine is standing by the door, not sure if she should come in even though Cosima has allowed her to. Sarah and Felix are whispering something at each other while Alison is looking at her like she's internally screaming 'murder'. Helena doesn't seem like she cares but she's standing beside Cosima like an overprotective sister.

"Alright, I'm gonna get something to eat," Sarah says, finally breaking the silence. She drags Felix along.

"But sestra, we just ate-," Helena adds but Alison gets the point and shushes her, taking her wrist and bringing her along.

"We're all still very hungry," Alison says, "Cosima, you should stay here with Delphine. We'll be back really soon."

Cosima opens her mouth, obviously wanting to protest but her sisters and Felix had headed out the door before she could say something.

Delphine finally crosses the threshold.

"Cosima,"

"Uh, yeah, hi,"

"Please look at me," Delphine says weakly.

Just two weeks ago, she and Cosima had been spending almost everyday with each other –six very real days which felt like a forever ago in Delphine's mind. She sighs internally.

"Why are you here, Delphine?"

"I want to talk to you,"

"About what?"

"You know what it is about,"

"No, I really don't," Cosima huffs, turning her back on Delphine and pacing around the room.

"You've been avoiding me all week,"

"Well I'm sorry if I couldn't find the courage to show my face after what I did,"

"Cosima… About that -,"

"You don't have to say anything Delphine, really. Look, I'm sorry that I kissed you that night, okay? I'm really sorry that I thought we had something else going on. I was wrong."

"But that's the thing," Delphine starts, reaching out her hand and grabbing the other girl's arm. Cosima turns around, her eyes locked on Delphine. "You weren't wrong."

"What?"

"Cosima… I –I can't stop thinking about that kiss,"


	16. Chapter 16

**chapter xvi**

"_I can't stop thinking about that kiss,"_

Cosima blinks. Once. Twice. She knows what she heard.

"What?" she asks, spinning furiously to face the other girl.

"I can't stop thinking about –you, Cosima," Delphine says, her fingers grazing her lips. She looks down as if she's embarrassed to admit what she's about to say next. "I don't know. All I can think about is you and that kiss. It –it's affected me more than what's appropriate."

Cosima opens her mouth but she doesn't know what to say. Cosima had planned what her speech would be when the time would come that she and Delphine would see each other again. She's memorized each word. But then again, in her imaginations, Delphine would have never told her this. In her thoughts, Delphine would have told her that the brunette kissing her was a mistake and that they should end their friendship because Cosima has made her uncomfortable. Not this. Definitely not this.

"Cosima, say something…"

Cosima stares at Delphine and how her shoulders slump. The sadness in Delphine's eyes awakens a hope in Cosima and it makes her step forward until she's inches from the blonde.

All week long, Cosima had avoided Delphine like a plague. She'd stay away from places where she might see Delphine and when she did see the girl, she'd bolt until she was out of sight. She wasn't ready to be rejected –god knows she's had enough of that. But she was well prepared for it. She knew rejection is inevitable. And that's all she's imagined in her mind since the night of the kiss.

She isn't prepared for this.

A part of her is telling her that maybe this is all just a dream, and that maybe Cosima needs to slap herself to wake up from this mocking illusion. She thinks that maybe this is all just a mirage, a working of her deepest unconscious desires. But Cosima knows –she knows full well that this is real. And that's the best part about it.

The look on Delphine's face, the way she wants Cosima to answer her: it's frying the brunette's brain. Cosima's skin tingles. She ambles forward, her eyes locked on Delphine's, their bodies not far apart.

This is her chance. Delphine is here and she's laid it all out on the line. It's all Cosima wants, so she does the same.

"Tell me why you can't stop thinking about the kiss, Delphine."

"I don't know," she answers.

"No… I know that you know. And you need to tell me now. Tell me why you're here. Tell me why you're telling me this."

Cosima would have expected Delphine to blurt something out, something like, "I like you," or "I find you attractive," or maybe even an "I can't think straight".

But she did not at all expect Delphine to lunge forward and grab the back of her neck, pulling her until their lips found each other.

Delphine's lips were soft and moist and everything that Cosima remembers they are. Cosima closes her eyes, immersing herself in the moment. She slips her hands to Delphine's waist and the blonde's hands slide down to her back. They remain like that, their lips connected as if they're made for each other's and Cosima wouldn't have it any other way. She doesn't want to stop. It's Delphine who came to her and its Delphine who kissed her. But deep down in Cosima's gut, she knows she has to pull away.

She steps back and as she opens her eyes, sees the surprise painted on Delphine's face.

Cosima waits until Delphine finally says something.

"I –I wanted to do that ever since you kissed me. I wanted to kiss you back. I wanted to do it again because I needed to prove to myself that I'm right,"

"Right about what?"

"Right about how I feel for you, Cosima."

Cosima's eyes widen. _Holy shit holy shit holy shit, _she thinks. _Is this really fucking happening?_

"And how do you feel about me, Delphine?" Cosima asks, praising herself for acting cool when deep down she wants to implode.

"I knew the moment I saw you that there's something about you. I can't stop myself from looking for you, from wanting to be with you. When I'm with you I feel alive. I feel free. I'm happy,"

"You are?"

"Oui, Cosima. I know that you know. You see it in my eyes when we're together. And I see it in yours."

"Then why did you run away when I kissed you?"

"Because I wanted to be sure of what I feel for you. And I wanted to be sure of myself. This is all new for me, Cosima. I've –I've never fallen in love with a girl before."

"_Fallen in love,_" Cosima gasps, "you've -,"

Delphine smiles, her eyes lighting up the entire room and Cosima smiles as well. There are many questions in her mind, but she knows that she could put them all on hold and savor this moment. It's not everyday that the person you like likes you back.

Delphine steps towards Cosima and takes her hand. She interlocks their fingers together.

"I have. I've fallen in love with you."

* * *

Scott cleans up the rest of the tables. It's almost the end of his shift and he knows that if he tidy things around the café quickly, he'd still have time to change before he goes to the toy convention on one of the shopping malls in town.

He takes a washcloth and wipes the counter, making sure everything is neat before he goes to the back. There he removes his apron.

He double checks the sink: no more dirty dishes. Good.

"Hey, Amy, I'm all done," Scott says to another employee.

"Alright Scott, see you tomorrow."

Just as Scott steps outside, he feels his cell vibrating on his back pocket. It's a call from Cosima.

"Hey, Cos, what's up?"

"_Yo dude, did you tell Delphine where I was?"_

"Uh –I, uhm," Scott stutters.

"_Don't lie to me, Scott."_

"Alright, I did, okay? She came to the café and she asked and I had to tell her."

"…"

"Cos?"

"…"

"Please don't kill me,"

"_On the contrary, Scott, I owe you big time."_


	17. Chapter 17

**chapter xvii**

_2 months later_

Delphine's hand snakes up Cosima's shirt and rests on her bare stomach. The brunette groans.

"Your hand is cold," she mumbles through closed eyes, earning a giggle from the blonde.

The sunlight peaking through the blinds makes its way to the sleeping Cosima and Delphine takes her time in appreciating how beautiful she looks in this light. Her hand remains on Cosima's stomach while the other one itches, wanting to touch the other girl's face and trace her jaw and cup her cheeks. _She's so beautiful. _

It's been two months since she went to the band's studio and confessed her feelings to Cosima –resulting in two beautiful months with her. Delphine has never been happier in her entire life. Finally, someone loves her in the way that she wants to be loved.

"I know you're staring at me," Cosima says, her eyes still closed.

"How do you know?"

"I just do."

"Your eyes aren't even open."

"Do you think I need to open my eyes to see you?"

_God. _

Cosima finally opens her eyes and gazes upon the beautiful woman beside her. There's so much passion and love and care in her eyes that Delphine swears that she's going to melt. Cosima looks at her like everyone wants to be looked at. And Delphine thinks she's so fucking lucky to have Cosima look at her that way.

"What are you thinking about?" Cosima asks.

"I'm thinking about how lucky I am with you," Delphine whispers.

Cosima smiles and rolls to her side to fully face Delphine. She cups the French girl's cheek before leaning in close and bringing their lips together.

Delphine moans at the connection.

"I'm luckier."

* * *

It's dark outside when Delphine returns to her apartment. She isn't going to stay long. She's just going to bathe and make herself pretty before she goes to The Brewery –one of the bars in the city.

"_I need you later, okay?" _she remember Cosima saying.

She doesn't exactly know why Cosima wants her at a bar later when they both agreed to keep their relationship a secret. Being together, being seen together, that would make their association public and that's something that Delphine isn't quite ready for.

It's not because she doesn't want people to know she's seeing Cosima. She'd shout it out to the heavens if she could. But she has to shush about it for awhile mainly because Jason doesn't know about it yet.

Cosima knows that Jason is unaware of their relationship and the brunette had been gracious enough to understand. But Delphine knows it's unfair for Cosima to be kept hidden. Cosima deserves to be on a pedestal and people need to know that Cosima is loved even if it's by someone like her.

That's why Delphine is going.

Maybe people won't know the relevance of her being there but Cosima would. And Delphine wants Cosima to be happy.

She wears tight jeans and a red shirt. Grabbing her cell and her apartment keys, she checks her watch and heads down. She hails a cab and tells the driver where to go. After a few minutes, Delphine sees the flashing neon sign that says 'The Brewery'.

"Keep the change," she says after handing the driver a couple of bills.

Delphine enters the establishment and immediately sees Scott on the tables in front of the mini stage.

She strolls towards him.

"Hello Scott," she says, tapping his back.

"Hey, Delphine. What are you doing here?"

"Cosima invited me."

Scott's smile turns into a full-blown grin at the mention of his friend's name. "Ah right, Cosima. So… how are things with the two of you?"

"Fine, Scott," Delphine responds, winking.

Sarah, then, appears out of nowhere, sporting a leather jacket and equally leather pants. The rest of the sisters follow but Cosima is nowhere to be found.

"If you're looking for the nerd, she's backstage. But she asked me to give you this," Sarah says, handing Delphine a single rose.

"Oh and that you should stay put," Alison adds with a huff.

Alison doesn't seem to like Delphine very much.

"Okay, merci," Delphine replies, wondering what gig Cosima has planned.

In a matter of seconds, Delphine's cell vibrates on her pocket. It's a text from Cosima.

_I can see you from backstage. _

Delphine is quick to reply.

_-You're unfair. I can't see you._

_Just stay where you are. You'll understand soon._

The lights focused on the mini stage dim as a dreadlock-haired girl steps up and takes the microphone from the stand. Delphine beams.

"Hi, everyone. It's me, Cosima from Game of Clones. Just give us a sec to prep and we'll be ready to entertain you."

It's a gig. Cosima invited Delphine to their band's gig and she had no clue.

Delphine giggles. Cosima is too cute.

After almost fifteen minutes, Cosima, her sisters and Felix are upstage, already with their musical instruments.

Cosima takes the microphone once again, taps it twice before she speaks, "Hi again everyone. We are the Game of Clones and we'll be entertaining you tonight with covers of hit songs. The first song we'll be singing for you on this fine evening is one by Paramore. We hope you all enjoy."

The steady rhythm of the piano reverberates across the bar and then the other instruments follow suit.

Delphine knows this song.

Cosima starts to sing.

_When I was younger I saw my daddy cry and curse at the wind_

_He broke his own heart and I watched as he tried to reassemble it_

_And my momma swore that she would never let herself forget_

_And that was the day that I promised I'd never sing of love if it does not exist_

Cosima looks into Delphine's eyes and the blonde swears she's never felt more at peace than now, watching Cosima.

It's been too long since she felt like this. In fact, Delphine thinks she's never felt like this before. She's not saying that she didn't love Jason. She did. But this love is different. It's…more. She doesn't want to invalidate her relationship with Jason by saying that. What she felt for Jason was real. But it's gone now. She just can't let him go yet because she doesn't know how to say it that's a little less heartbreaking. After everything, she doesn't want to hurt him –although she knows that she's technically already doing so.

If that would make her a bitch, then Delphine guesses she is one. She's playing him. She's hiding her. But Delphine knows how she feels and she feels everything for Cosima. And right now, and for a longer time, she's certain that it's her.

So she decides to live in the present and mouths the next lyrics as Cosima sings them.

_But darling you are the only exception_

* * *

**A/N: **hey guys! i hope you all enjoyed this update. i know some readers are wondering where jason is, don't worry he'll show up after a few more cophine fluffs. reviews are greatly appreciated and if anyone has prompts that i might add or suggestions that i could put into the story, those would be wonderful as well. thank you for sticking with this!

**A/N2:** the song in this chapter is the only exception by paramore


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: **hello everyone! i'm so sorry for the long wait but here it is! enjoy.

* * *

**chapter xviii**

"You're in a good mood," Felix comments as he notices Cosima humming a tune.

"She's been in that mood since two months ago," Sarah says.

"Sestra is in love, yes?"

Cosima grins when she overhears. She thinks that maybe the words 'in love' are an understatement. After all, Cosima has never felt more loved in her entire life. She's been in relationships before, of course. But they're nothing compared to this. F. Scott Fitzgerald was right. There are indeed many types of love in this world but never the same love twice. And this love that she shares with Delphine, it's unlike anything she's ever had before. God she's so lucky.

She takes her coat from the hanger, ready to head towards the door when she hears Alison scoff behind her.

"Where are you going?"

She turns around and sees her sister with her arms crossed on her chest. "I'm going to see Delphine." Alison doesn't hide the scowl on her face. "Is something wrong?"

When Cosima told her sisters about her and Delphine's relationship, Alison had been the one to disagree. She's happy for her sister, but she's not happy that it's Delphine that she's with. Cosima couldn't help but wonder why her sister feels opposes her relationship with the blonde.

"If you have a problem with it Ali, you have to tell me."

"It's not like it's going to change anything," Alison replies and lets Cosima leave.

* * *

Cosima arrives at Delphine's apartment ten minutes later. She knocks on the front door and grins from her cheeks when Delphine opens up.

"Bonjour mon amour," the blonde says as she lets Cosima in. "I didn't know you were coming."

"I wanted to see you,"

Delphine blushes, although she tries her hardest not to let it show. Cosima catches the light shade of pink on her cheeks, however, and kisses it, watching as it turns to red. She waits for Delphine to close the door behind them before she interlaces their fingers together.

She feels them connect, like there's electricity from both of them and it fizzes when they touch each other. It's magical and she knows that Delphine feels it too because her breath hitches when they lock gazes with one another.

It's beautiful, really, how the mere touching of their hands brings this kind of wonder to both of them.

"So what were you doing before I arrived?" Cosima asks, wary that she might have disturbed Delphine.

"I was thinking about you," Delphine teases, waggling her eyebrows as she leads Cosima to her bedroom.

"Really now?"

"Ha ha, no, not really, I mean, why would I be thinking about you?" the blonde answers before leaning in to peck on Cosima's nose. She pulls the brunette towards her and they tumble down her bed. They lay there, beside one another, looking at each other with loving eyes, their hands interlocked.

Cosima couldn't help but smile at Delphine's complete ability to be adorable. She's so charming, so enchanting, and so fucking perfect and every single word that's synonymous to those. And for the first time in a long while, Cosima is actually happy. So she can't help but fathom why Alison doesn't approve of their relationship.

She sighs when she thinks about her sister and maybe her face shows the same confusion because Delphine furrows her brows and asks, "Are you okay ma cherie?"

"I'm fine, "

"No, you're not. I can see right through you Cosima. Tell me what's wrong,"

"It's Alison," Cosima says and she feels Delphine stiffen. Of course Delphine knows about her sister's indifference towards them. After all, Alison can be quite subtle when she wants to be.

"She doesn't like me," Delphine mumbles, playing with Cosima's hand.

"She does."

"She doesn't. I can tell. Do you know why?"

"I don't. But does it matter? She's not the one you're dating," Cosima jokes.

Delphine turns so that she's fully facing Cosima. She takes her hand from the brunette's clasp and rests it on her cheek. "Of course it matters. She's your sister and I love them too because they're important to you. I want them to like me, Cosima. I want them to approve of me because they're permanent in your life and having them agree to me makes me feel like I could be permanent too."

Cosima feels her heart tighten at Delphine's words. Never had she ever have someone who's wanted her family's approval as much as Delphine does. She weakens. For the first time, someone wants to be permanent in her life. It terrifies her a little because she's never had that with anyone before. She's never had anyone blatantly tell her that.

Delphine must have noticed Cosima's emotional shift because she clears her throat, removes her hand from Cosima's cheek and turns to lie on her back. She's about to say something else when Cosima cuts her off. "You really want to be permanent in my life?"

Delphine turns to her. "Of course,"

"So you mean to say you want to work it out with Alison?"

"Yes, I would like that very much."

Cosima thinks. "Hmm, then maybe you have dinner with us the night after tomorrow."

"Dinner with you and your sisters?"

"And my parents." Delphine stiffens.

"Your parents?"

"I want you to be in my life permanently too Delphine. So yes, with my parents. I think it's about damn time they meet you." Cosima replies.

* * *

**A/N2: **yes, yes i know that it's short but i promise to make it up to you on the next chapters. i hope you stay with it! (feel free to leave reviews guys. oh and prompts are much welcomed)


	19. Chapter 19

**chapter xix**

Delphine stares at her reflection. She frowns. Pink isn't really her color. She sighs, ambling towards her closet in search of something to wear that's more of her style.

Tonight is dinner night with Cosima and her family and Delphine wants to be perfect.

She wants to make an impression, of course. It's not everyday that she gets to meet someone's parents. Especially if that said someone is someone she happens to be dating.

It had been a couple of nights ago when Cosima suggested that Delphine meet her parents. The blonde had stiffened, to be honest. She had never imagined Cosima proposing such thing but she had and Delphine knows it's because of wanting permanence. Letting someone meet your parents is a big deal, or at least for Delphine it is. It goes to show that Cosima isn't merely dallying with her and that what they have is something that the brunette wants to share with the people she cares about.

So yes, Delphine wants to make an impression.

She takes a black sleeveless dress from the cabinet, holds it up to her chest as she looks at her reflection again and smiles. Yup. Out with the pink and in with the black.

She peels off the pink dress that she's wearing and steps into the black one, definitely more confident that she'd look better with it. As soon as she zips up the black dress, she sits in front of her vanity mirror and begins donning make-up.

She's about to put on her lipstick when she hears a knock on her door. _Hmm, _she wonders. Who could it be? Cosima isn't picking her up. And she definitely doesn't remember inviting someone over.

Another knock.

"I'm coming," she yells out as she walks toward the door. She opens it and is surprised to see Jason on the other side.

Jason does a double take on her. His brows crease.

"What are you doing here?" Delphine says a little too defensively.

"Am I not allowed to surprise my girlfriend?"

Delphine doesn't know what to say. _Merde. _What is she going to do?

"Where are you off to?" Jason says as he puts his palm on the door and pushes, letting himself in without Delphine's invitation. "You look like you're going on a date."

"I'm not going on a date," Delphine says. "I'm having dinner at a friend's house."

"Looking like that?"

"Yes," Delphine replies.

"And who could this friend be?"

Jason clearly seems like he knows something's up. And Delphine is beginning to tremble at the way he's looking at her accusingly. Of course she'd tremble. She's hiding something. She's guilty. And Jason knows it.

"Sarah,"

"Sarah?"

"Sarah from Game of Clones," Delphine says, walking towards her bedroom to continue putting on her make-up before she'd been interrupted. If she continues on without seeming guilty, she might just get out of this.

"Game of Clones, huh? You've been spending a lot of time with them lately, especially their lead singer," Jason drawls out the last words.

"Oui, she's my friend. They're all my friends," Delphine replies before she dons her lipstick.

"I see,"

Delphine sighs. "Is there a reason why you're here Jason?" She says when she exits her bedroom and sees him seated on one of the chairs by the dining table.

Jason seems taken aback by Delphine's question and Delphine knows she shouldn't have asked. Jason had been surprising her before she met Cosima. In fact, he'd been doing a lot of things before and Delphine seemed to love all of the attention. Until now, of course. Now she doesn't seem to appreciate any of Jason's efforts. And Jason sees it as clear as day.

"Is there a reason why you've been acting so coldly towards me for the past couple months, Delphine?"

_Cosima, _Delphine wants to say. She wants to say that the reason she's been acting the way she has is because she doesn't love him anymore and that she's fallen in love with someone else. She's fallen in love with someone else whom she has been secretly dating for the past couple of months. She wants to tell him the truth. She wants to tell him how she really feels so that she could finally free herself from this relationship she doesn't want to be in. But she can't. She doesn't want to hurt him. But she's hurting herself in the process. And even if Cosima says she understands, Delphine knows it's unfair for her too.

"No, Jason. I just…" _how can she say it? How can she tell him without breaking his heart? _"I just don't know where we stand anymore," she decides to say.

"Where we stand? You're my girlfriend. I'm your boyfriend," he says as if it were that easy.

_Yes. I am your girlfriend and you are my boyfriend but I am not in love with you anymore, _Delphine badly wants to say.

She sighs. "I know, Jason. But -,"

"But what?"

"I don't know," Delphine says. God. How does she say it?

"Tell me Delphine," he says, standing up and reaching out to touch her shoulders. Delphine looks at him and she sees sincerity in his eyes. He looks so genuinely confused, like he really doesn't know what's going on or what he did wrong to deserve this kind of treatment from Delphine.

And that's exactly the kind of expression that makes Delphine sick of herself. She's hurting someone at the expense of her happiness because yes it is unfair that she's dating him and she's seeing someone else too. It's unfair because she doesn't love him anymore but she's still keeping him around. He's cheated on her before and he's hurt her because of that but what kind of person is she if she does the same to him, right? That's not the way things should go.

God she should have just told him before. She should have just been honest with him and told him she didn't love him anymore.

But she can't. She just can't. She doesn't want to hurt him. But she has to leave soon because Cosima is waiting for her.

So instead she raises her hand and cups his cheek, "Nothing. Nothing's wrong Jason," she tries her best to say. "I'm just…I'm just tired because of so many things I have to deal with at school."

"This has nothing to do with anyone else?"

"Non, of course not." Delphine swallows hard.

"And you still love me?"

"Yes."

"Then come out with me tonight," he says, taking her by the hands, his touch gentle and his eyes pleading. "Let me make everything alright, please. Let me treat you tonight. I know we've been going through something for the past couple of months and I just want to make everything right."

Delphine looks at him. She has to turn him down. She has to. But turning him down means him asking more questions. _Merde._

"I can't. I'm going to Sarah's tonight, remember?"

"Is it important?" he asks, letting go of her hands.

"It's her uh—parents' anniversary. And she invited me over a long time ago. It would be very rude not to come," she says, trying her best to sound convincing.

Jason looks at her and then nods and sighs. She knows she's off the hook.

"Let me drive you there then."

"What? You don't have to."

"No, I want to. I insist," he says and Delphine knows there's nothing she can do.

* * *

**A/N: **hey guys! i am so sorry for the long wait. school had been a total drag but anyway, here it is. i hope you stick with it til the end!


	20. Chapter 20

**chapter xx**

The tables are set, the food smells delicious and her sisters had promised to be on their best behavior. Delphine is coming over tonight and Cosima wants nothing more than for it to be perfect. It has to be. She's letting someone she cares about, –someone she loves – meet her parents and that's one thing she rarely ever does.

"Calm down Cos," Sarah says when she notices her sister fidgeting.

"Sestra is nervous because angel is coming over?"

"Yeah, definitely," Cosima answers.

"It's gonna be alright, Cos," Sarah chuckles.

Cosima's never been like this. Or maybe she has but she doesn't remember. It all feels so novel to her, that slight anxiety of bringing someone over for her parents to meet.

"Hey, Cos, mum's gonna love her, alright?"

"I really hope so."

The doorbell rings and Cosima is quick on her feet. She lopes towards the front door and then waits a second before she opens it. When she finally does, it's not Delphine that she sees first. It's the blue pick-up on the street with Jason inside.

"Hello, Cosima," Delphine says with a somber look.

"Hi," Cosima replies, pushing away the urge to embrace Delphine because her fucking boyfriend is watching them. "What's he doing here?" She whispers.

"He insisted on driving me here."

"And you let him?"

Cosima knows she shouldn't be angry. She knows full well that Jason is still Delphine's boyfriend. She can't help herself though. Heat is radiating off of her skin at the way Jason is studying them. She sighs. _It's been two months. I should be used to this by now, _Cosima thinks.

Delphine doesn't answer her but her pleading eyes make Cosima shiver because she understands that perhaps Delphine really didn't have a choice.

She opens the door wider to let Delphine in.

* * *

Dinner goes out half the way Cosima planned it to be. Delphine has succeeded in charming her parents' pants off (especially with her looks, accent, humor and obvious smart-assery in medical fields). Helena had managed to spill a quarter of the steak sauce but Alison had it cleaned in a jiffy. Sarah kept making dirty jokes but they were all funny. Apparently when her sisters said they'd be on their "best" behavior, they meant their usual charming selves. Delphine didn't seem to mind. In fact, she seemed to really enjoy herself.

Cosima wants to be happy. Well, she is. But not as happy as she had hoped to be. She wants to revel in the moment, to really be overjoyed because her parents now know about the girl she's fallen in love with. But for some reason, all Cosima can think about is that infernal blue pick-up and that infernal boy who just so happens to be Delphine's boyfriend.

God she feels pathetic.

They've talked about this. She understands that Delphine isn't ready to break up with Jason yet. She gets that she doesn't want to because Jason's not stupid and he's going to know that it's because of her and people are going to figure out the same thing. People are going to know that Delphine is dating a girl and people are going to talk about her and yes, Cosima understands that Delphine is not ready. Her whole life is going to change and that's not going to be easy.

She said she understands. She, herself, told Delphine they'd keep it a secret –that she'd be kept a secret. She gets it. She really does. But that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.

It's been two months. They've been together for two months and all this time they've been living this whole other life wherein they're together. And Cosima is happy. But then she remembers that it's not real life they're living and that at the end of the day, what people know about is Delphine and Jason. And maybe that's fine. Other people don't have to know. But Jason's always going to be there isn't he? Cosima understands that now. She saw it in the way Jason looked at them, the way his eyes grazed at Delphine with such possessiveness. And he has every right to be.

"Are you okay?" Delphine asks when they're all alone in the backyard.

Cosima wants to say yes but she can't help herself so she decides to be honest. "No."

"It's because of Jason, isn't it?"

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry. I honestly did not know he was going to my apartment. He insisted on driving me over."

"I know."

"Then why are you still sad, mon amour?"

"I don't know. I mean, I get it, okay? I get it. You're still with him. I agreed to be your secret, remember?"

Silence.

Cosima hates it when they talk about this. She feels like she's going to lose her each time they do. She feels like Delphine is going to realize that Cosima doesn't understand, that Cosima is asking for too much and then she's going to run off because she cannot give what Cosima wants.

"It's fine Delphine," Cosima relents.

She sighs. Delphine takes her hand and kisses it.

"I'm so sorry, Cosima. I'm so sorry." Delphine says and she's so sincere about it that Cosima almost wants to apologize for even broaching the topic.

She understands. She does. She needs to. She agreed to this. She needs to.

"I know."

"Come home with me," Delphine whispers. "Let me make it up to you."

* * *

**A/N: **hello everyone! thank you to those who reviewed the previous chapter. i'm really sorry if Delphine is grating on your nerves. she's grating on mine too, but she's going to continue doing that for a while. i apologize in advance for that. even so, i honestly hope that you guys don't get tired of this and stick with it to the end. oh and yes… possible smut in the next chapter. hoho! thanks guys!


End file.
